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calucalay

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calucalay

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 428
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

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calucalay's page activity

Visits<b>iG_08</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 2:01am<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 11:53pm<b>colinabi</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 9:00pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:41am<b>Brittin8or</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 8:30pm<b>Lustig_Junge</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 10:18am<b>alyse_galligan</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 11:50pm<b>mushroomcassette</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 11:21pm<b>Moklon</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 10:29pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 8:50pm<b>nishtz95</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 1:06pm<b>pygmyfrog</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 9:12pm<b>samimarie94</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 11:58pm<b>Iheartmonkies</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 11:30pm<b>Respect101</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 8:08pm<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 10:26pm<b>Damafia</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 9:20am<b>Epikouros</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 4:37pm

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calucalay's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

Today, I discovered that if you heckle a mime, it's possible that the mime will actually kick your ass. FML

#21283193
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15533) - you deserved it (34743)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:24pm - misc - by mr_cheese (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my parents told me off for reading, as opposed to watching TV like the rest of the family, because it was "anti-social". FML

#21282362
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32887) - you deserved it (2329)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43353) - you deserved it (9434) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

#21190484
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46384) - you deserved it (8343)

On 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Comunidad Valenciana)

Today, I went to spend my last $50 on gas, since I get paid in 5 days. I paid for the gas and stepped into the restroom briefly. I came out, only to discover that the attendant had put the gas on the wrong pump, and someone had used it for themselves. My tank is empty. FML

Today, my husband and I put our children to bed a little earlier than usual, so we could have some sexy time. Immediately following my full-blown orgasm, I rolled over, only to see my wide-eyed son peeking over the top of the mattress. FML

#21133668
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64377) - you deserved it (14956)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML

#21102946
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49255) - you deserved it (6079)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:10pm - kids - by I Have Failed (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, my 7-year-old daughter made a new game: hitting me in the groin when I'm not expecting it. She hunts me in the house, hides around corners, and behind furniture to ambush me. She'll even do it if she catches me napping. I'm a grown man living in fear of a little girl. FML

#21029770
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53064) - you deserved it (11937)

On 01/16/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

#21001182
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50298) - you deserved it (5003)

On 12/22/2013 at 10:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56353) - you deserved it (3173)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my 4-year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed that "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex". FML

#20875776
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49285) - you deserved it (4246)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I moved into my university dorm a week before classes start. Everyone kept giving me weird looks as they watched me move my stuff in. Finally, one of my dorm mates asked me if I knew that school had actually started last week. I didn't. FML

#20848839
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46139) - you deserved it (14947)

On 08/22/2013 at 1:31am - work - by Kingofbosses (man) - United States

Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. We decided to play chicken and I was on the shoulders of the guy I like. Right as we started playing, for some unearthly reason my body decided to let out a little pee. I thought he wouldn't notice since we were already wet. He did. FML

#20804466
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54253) - you deserved it (17636)

On 07/26/2013 at 10:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I saw my older sister for the first time in three years. We hadn't spoke since I found out that she was the woman my college boyfriend left me for. Unfortunately, our reunion was fueled by her two-year-old son's desire to meet his dad. My husband. FML

#20760666
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66077) - you deserved it (5300)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:39pm - love - by Jenn (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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