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Today, I went for a run in a new pair of shoes that left me with huge blisters. As I finished cleaning them up so they could heal, I limped to my bed to take a nap. I was woken by the fire alarm. My building was having a drill and we couldn't use the elevators. I live on the 9th floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21511) - you deserved it (2789)
On 11/14/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by runner - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my 7 year old brother decided that it would be fun to cut off my hair. I woke from a long nap after working the late shift, to about 15 inches of my long blonde hair all over my bed and floor. I now have bloody bald spots and really choppy hair about 3 inches long. He got away with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39721) - you deserved it (2222)
On 11/02/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by baldygirl (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that if you let your son install a new shower head, he won't tighten it properly. So when you turn the shower on, it will shoot out at rocket speed, hitting you in the face. Then when you grab the shower handle to prevent yourself falling backwards, you will just rip that out and hit your head again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26069) - you deserved it (4092)
On 10/16/2009 at 10:38pm - misc - by Ndanick1193 (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I learned to check inside the oven before you preheat it. Sometimes children hide their pet rabbit in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58476) - you deserved it (8020)
On 09/28/2009 at 3:15am - misc - by ripfluffy (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my parents told me they wouldn't be able to afford my senior portraits. That was fine with me, until I found some expensive professional photos in the mail. Of our dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38290) - you deserved it (1431)
On 09/13/2009 at 12:44pm - animals - by sarahpft (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (137046) - you deserved it (10981)
On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, in Chem, I was chosen to hold the fire extinguisher just in case something happened while showing how to blow up a dangerous chemical. My teacher told me to spray if anything got out of control. He lit the fire and I freaked out and sprayed it. The entire wing of my school was evacuted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6964) - you deserved it (29589)
On 09/08/2009 at 6:10pm - misc - by firefighter (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I finally figured out why my 5 year old daughter washes her hair everyday. It's because she doesn't want to have "yucky greasy" hair like her mommy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10848) - you deserved it (31971)
On 09/07/2009 at 4:25pm - kids - by greasyhair (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I discovered the guy that sits next to me in class is actually a girl. Not only is that bad, but we had to write a paper about each other. I used the words "him" and "he", and read it to the whole class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21189) - you deserved it (28413)
On 09/03/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Whoops (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Today, I went to a concert. Knowing these concerts usually include a lot of black lights, I decided to wear a black T-shirt so I wouldn't glow. I was having a good time, but about halfway through I noticed someone pointing to my shoulder. I looked down to see my dandruff glowing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26583) - you deserved it (12207)
On 08/26/2009 at 12:29am - misc - by Raaar (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, I was walking with my husband, holding hands, when a man with a rainbow shirt on came up to us. He said, "I'm so glad that gay men can go out in public without being embarassed nowdays!" He patted me on the back and walked away. I'm a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41212) - you deserved it (4530)
On 08/25/2009 at 10:16pm - misc - by offendedfemme (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17711) - you deserved it (29400)
On 08/24/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by NotThatKind (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that the crumbs on the couch that look like the oreos you just ate, can actually turn out to be very crunchy, and have legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7873) - you deserved it (35412)
On 08/22/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at the laundromat doing my clothes when I noticed a cute guy next to me. I tried to be a ninja and sneak my sock into his basket so I could start a conversation with him. He saw me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6947) - you deserved it (58416)
On 08/18/2009 at 4:52pm - misc - by Laundrylady (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was at the laundromat doing my clothes when I noticed a cute guy next to me. I tried to be a ninja and sneak my sock into his basket so I could start a conversation with him. He saw me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6947) - you deserved it (58416)
On 08/18/2009 at 4:52pm - misc - by Laundrylady (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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