Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

buhnaynay

Search for a member

buhnaynay

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5442
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

buhnaynay's page activity

Visits<b>username666</b> - the 05/01/2009 at 5:31pm<b>safman44</b> - the 04/05/2009 at 4:51pm

buhnaynay's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

buhnaynay's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML

#1971968
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46108) - you deserved it (3545)

On 05/16/2009 at 4:39am - misc - by notacreep (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, a little girl at my work had an accident. She asked me to help her change, and as she was changing she stuck her hand in her vagina to make sure all the "peepee was gone". She then put that same hand on my face to balance herself as she finished changing. FML

#1949482
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57364) - you deserved it (3425)

On 05/14/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by thisreallyhappened (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 6 year old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop 'pretending to be daddy' against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML

#1942963
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31357) - you deserved it (43619)

On 05/14/2009 at 8:03pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was walking to find a public toilet in a Chinese village. While looking for the women's restroom, I stepped on a thin sheet of plastic. I fell into the toilet's waste collection area and found myself knee-deep in the villagers' faeces. FML

#1897379
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66063) - you deserved it (5258)

On 05/13/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by pooped (woman) - China (Beijing)

Today, I had all four of my wisdom teeth extracted. Under anesthesia I told the dentist my entire love life and drug history in detail. FML

#1877566
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55768) - you deserved it (13612)

On 05/12/2009 at 4:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went out to a nice restaurant for my friend's birthday. I went to the bathroom and heard the woman in the other stall crying. She couldn't pull her underwear up over her obese, old-lady ass because her arms don't reach that far anymore. I was the only one there. I had no choice. FML

#1866535
382 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75062) - you deserved it (10821)

On 05/12/2009 at 3:19am - health - by bathroomseww (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a bath and needed shampoo. I leaned on the soap holder to get some and it came off the wall. Huge ants started pouring out running up the walls, down the walls, EVERYWHERE. I ran out of the bathroom screaming, completely naked. FML

#1862791
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77352) - you deserved it (6066)

On 05/12/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by Karmas3itch - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized what my mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her being from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." FML

#1837844
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93301) - you deserved it (5102)

On 05/11/2009 at 5:09am - misc - by mistake (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

#1751488
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76918) - you deserved it (23432)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML

#1749459
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (139022) - you deserved it (14125)

On 05/08/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Oblivious (woman) - Kuwait

Today, I went to the pet store to get mice for my mom's snakes. While checking out, the guy working behind the register asked what kind of snakes I had. I told him they were my mom's and he mentioned this crazy woman that talks to her snakes. That's my mom. FML

#1717469
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49649) - you deserved it (4163)

On 05/07/2009 at 1:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, as I was running a cute guy was coming towards me. As he was passing me, he yelled "nice tush!" I said thanks and slapped my ass flirtatiously. He stopped running, laughed and pointed to my crotch, replying "No, I said nice BUSH" I looked down to see my shorts had rode up a bit too high. FML

#1701817
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19805) - you deserved it (65314)

On 05/06/2009 at 8:20pm - misc - by schmoodles - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, was my first meeting with business partners as I am new to the team. Instead of saying that I was looking forward to "stretching my legs" or "spreading my wings", I told them I was anxious to start "spreading my legs". FML

#1683242
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57429) - you deserved it (19981)

On 05/06/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was walking out of the train station when an old man grabbed me. I started screaming, yelling, "HELP" like a madwoman and tried pushing him away - that's when I saw the golf cart rush past me. He was trying to push me aside from getting run over. Everyone started laughing. FML

#1651760
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12213) - you deserved it (51384)

On 05/05/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by station (woman) - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: