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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42165) - you deserved it (8002)
On 04/10/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40765) - you deserved it (4305)
On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38287) - you deserved it (11667)
On 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by fucked by sex ed (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34463) - you deserved it (5148)
On 03/15/2013 at 1:44am - misc - by fmlman - United States (Wyoming)
Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44517) - you deserved it (11193)
On 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by RedWaters - United States
Today, the guy who confessed his love for me also confessed that in his rage, he almost shot the last girl who broke his heart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30764) - you deserved it (2204)
On 02/23/2013 at 8:46am - love - by BadAssBandit897 (woman) - Canada
Today, my boss told me to go outside and take part in the company's stupid Harlem Shake video. When I declined, he threatened to fire me if I didn't take part. I ended up being the guy who had to furiously pelvic thrust before the music dropped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29865) - you deserved it (4484)
On 02/23/2013 at 2:32am - work - by mypelvishurts - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27603) - you deserved it (5380)
On 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm - love - by NewlyDread (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31551) - you deserved it (1345)
On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23813) - you deserved it (2459)
On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34007) - you deserved it (7013)
On 01/27/2013 at 6:10am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29478) - you deserved it (2732)
On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. In the entrance way I felt a slight tugging on my jeans. Used to my Doberman tugging when he wants to play, I shoved hard with my foot. I successfully punted their Chihuahua off the ground and into the next room where it landed with a thud. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16982) - you deserved it (32273)
On 01/15/2013 at 2:33am - animals - by I think its dead (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23656) - you deserved it (2138)
On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22274) - you deserved it (13901)
On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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