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brookeo13

Offline (the 09/01/2015 at 4:47am) | Search for a member

brookeo13

0Fucked!

brookeo13brookeo13
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 October 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 471
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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brookeo13's page activity

Visits<b>moron011</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 11:36pm<b>stangluv</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 12:15pm

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brookeo13's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to the sound of 4 gunshots from downstairs. I screamed, hid under the bed in tears and called the cops. Turned out my boyfriend hadn't been murdered by a burglar like I thought - he'd found a tarantula in our living room and decided to feed it a face full of lead. FML

#21428622
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28115) - you deserved it (3438)

On 06/19/2015 at 3:00pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

#21428553
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31273) - you deserved it (13096)

On 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by shmarf (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML

#21427606
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30187) - you deserved it (8567)

On 06/17/2015 at 2:09pm - kids - by RecentCollegeGrad (woman) -

Today, my co-worker told me how "lucky" I am that I "chose" to be a lesbian, because I don't have to deal with "guy drama". I spent two years of my adolescence sleeping at a bus stop and begging strangers for money after I got kicked out of home. FML

#21427509
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35472) - you deserved it (3399)

On 06/17/2015 at 9:31am - misc - by Lesbihonest (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was on a boat and I thought I saw a towel fly off, but it was actually my fricken dog. FML

#21426414
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32055) - you deserved it (5036)

On 06/15/2015 at 10:49am - animals - by justin Bieber - United States (Michigan)

Today, after 5 years in a row of my family doing absolutely nothing to even acknowledge my birthday, I got train tickets to see my boyfriend for the weekend and celebrate with him. I woke up to 6 angry texts about how I'm 'selfish' for not staying at home with my family. FML

#21426395
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32935) - you deserved it (2233)

On 06/15/2015 at 9:39am - misc - by happy21sttome (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, after 5 years in a row of my family doing absolutely nothing to even acknowledge my birthday, I got train tickets to see my boyfriend for the weekend and celebrate with him. I woke up to 6 angry texts about how I'm 'selfish' for not staying at home with my family. FML

#21426395
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32935) - you deserved it (2233)

On 06/15/2015 at 9:39am - misc - by happy21sttome (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my homophobic boyfriend, who I was giving a chance to grow the fuck up and get over his obsession with bashing gays, has been cheating on me with another man. FML

#21425403
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38578) - you deserved it (4212)

On 06/13/2015 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my roommate with her ass cheeks spread wide, and her friend ripping a strip of wax off of her while wearing a headlamp flashlight to see if she "got it all". FML

#21420563
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30549) - you deserved it (3328)

On 06/04/2015 at 3:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I'm warning you: never spoon naked with your girlfriend after eating taco bell. The shartpocalypse just might begin in her ass and end on your stomach. FML

#21420039
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30219) - you deserved it (4304)

On 06/03/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my class was called to the auditorium. We were told that some asshat proctor took a picture of our testing room during out test and posted it on Facebook. Someone noticed that according to the rules, we were sitting too close to each other, so now we have to retake the whole test. FML

#21419617
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27591) - you deserved it (1946)

On 06/02/2015 at 9:13am - misc - by Donewithit (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad stood by and nodded in agreement as my sister told me that my clinical depression is "getting REALLY old." FML

#21416569
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29071) - you deserved it (3435)

On 05/27/2015 at 9:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, while serving a customer, she told me: "God made you a working class citizen so you could serve! If God wanted you to go to college, he would have made sure you were able to go!" FML

Today, my aunt, whom I live with, told me she is going to move out and demanded her half of the rent back, as she only spent two days a week there. When I told her that's not how rent works, she called my mom to tell her what a failure she had raised. Her own sons are unemployed drug addicts. FML

#21414120
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29067) - you deserved it (1924)

On 05/22/2015 at 6:14pm - money - by Failure (woman) - Germany (Sachsen-Anhalt)

Today, my girlfriend of a week showed me her talent: shooting milk out of her vagina across the room. Goodbye dairy products. FML

#21413854
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30343) - you deserved it (3852)

On 05/22/2015 at 2:55am - intimacy - by zzarzzur (man) - United States (California)



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