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brocept

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brocept
  • Town/Country : Salt Lake City, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 September 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1883
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About brocept : I like sports and being crazy and also do a lot of stupid stuff.

brocept's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

brocept's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to NYPD detectives banging on my door with flashlights, looking for some criminal who used to live in my house. Apparently, when they showed the man's mugshot to my neighbors upstairs, for some reason they identified the man as my husband. FML

#16708517
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28300) - you deserved it (2417)

On 06/17/2011 at 7:06am - love - by ari - United States

Today, I was yelled at by my mum for not wanting to get a spray tan for my cousin's wedding because if I don't, I will "shine like a beacon of disrespect" among the other attendees. FML

#16697911
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24699) - you deserved it (2354)

On 06/16/2011 at 4:53pm - misc - by vampire (woman) - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, after a long night of drinking and partying, I woke up in my bed next to a beast of a woman. At least I know I made it home safely. FML

#16696125
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10039) - you deserved it (40909)

On 06/16/2011 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by Madmanmorton (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my professor spent the entire class showing us how to make paper airplanes. I pay over 40 grand a year for college. FML

#16694392
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30025) - you deserved it (5354)

On 06/16/2011 at 12:03pm - misc - by Scholar (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was mowing my neighbors lawn, I found the playboy magazine he left in his yard. I found it with the mower. I spent the next hour picking up little shards of naked women for no extra pay. FML

#16693545
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23656) - you deserved it (4943)

On 06/16/2011 at 10:43am - intimacy - by - United States (Texas)

Today, my son invited his girlfriend over to our house just to break up with her. Then he asked me to drive her home. So I was then stuck in a car with a bawling teenage girl who lived over twenty minutes away. FML

#16692971
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36659) - you deserved it (5295)

On 06/16/2011 at 9:20am - kids - by Username - United States

Today, I was working the register at our local McDonald's. After a strange man left a massive order, he said, "Can I pay you in gummy worms?" FML

#16690191
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32393) - you deserved it (3793)

On 06/16/2011 at 2:37am - work - by Hank Gummyworm - United States (Michigan)

Today, my son's homework was to write a story about what he wants to be when he grows up. He wrote that he plans on being unemployed and living at home until we throw him out, then he'll live under a bridge. He's only 12, but already planning for a future as an unemployed bum. FML

#16676970
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29870) - you deserved it (7407)

On 06/15/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by Seriously (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML

#16676929
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40531) - you deserved it (3127)

On 06/15/2011 at 12:42pm - health - by Braxam - United States

Today, my boyfriend wouldn't kiss me because there was a picture of Superman on my shirt. FML

#16668659
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27166) - you deserved it (9178)

On 06/14/2011 at 10:38pm - love - by Username (woman) - United States

Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML

#16667115
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30665) - you deserved it (10624)

On 06/14/2011 at 9:17pm - intimacy - by Username - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I went to visit my boyfriend at work. That's where I met his pregnant girlfriend. FML

#16661874
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52886) - you deserved it (4541)

On 06/14/2011 at 2:37pm - love - by hatelife - United States (Ohio)

Today, I invited over my best friend, whom I've loved for over a year, since she had to tell me "something important". I got excited and thought she was going to tell me she loved me too. She ended up coming out to me, and wanted to know if I would meet her girlfriend. FML

#16661429
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38752) - you deserved it (5228)

On 06/14/2011 at 2:06pm - love - by :( (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was arrested for carrying a dangerous weapon. I was on my way home from the shop where I'd bought a new kitchen knife. FML

#16657844
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31099) - you deserved it (3066)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:47am - misc - by lalala (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

#16657656
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12518) - you deserved it (45859)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)



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