Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

brocept

Search for a member

brocept
  • Town/Country : Salt Lake City, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 September 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1873
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About brocept : I like sports and being crazy and also do a lot of stupid stuff.

brocept's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

brocept's favorite FMLs

Today, I sent my best friend Mike the link to a porn site we were talking about at a party. Turns out the name "Mom" is right next to "Mike" in my contacts list. FML

#9718
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12295) - you deserved it (44806)

On 02/05/2009 at 10:39am - intimacy - by menerethrr - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had a sexy dream, woke up and started to masturbate quite vigorously. When I finished, I hopped off the top bunk naked to see my brother and his girlfriend laying in the bottom bunk. FML

#6850
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13638) - you deserved it (42207)

On 02/03/2009 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by thermos (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a fast food restaurant. The guy behind me was a pretty hot latin guy. When I went to pay, my purse fell off the counter. My birth control pills, a condom, 3 super plus tampons and an extra pair of underwear I keep in there for emergencies fell out at his feet. FML

#5739
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20012) - you deserved it (9162)

On 02/02/2009 at 7:42pm - misc - by houdini - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML

#4715
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36406) - you deserved it (4117)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Bear - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML

#4708
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33491) - you deserved it (7241)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:29pm - misc - by frankrizzo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was collecting on a bet I had with a buddy on a sports game. He owed me lunch. I have a huge crush on the waitress and told him. She asked if we wanted the checks split and he said, "No, my boyfriend doesn't have any money." FML

#4148
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25313) - you deserved it (4925)

On 01/31/2009 at 1:19pm - love - by MichiganExile - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found my car completely vandalized when I came home from work. A paper on the seat read "That's for what you did to Hannah you fuck". Hannah? FML

#1295
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29401) - you deserved it (1410)

On 01/15/2009 at 6:32pm - love - by Camm. - United States (New York)

Today, it's been 2 weeks since I lost my virginity and I've already had sex with 3 guys. I think I'm a nympho. FML

#723
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9004) - you deserved it (67168)

On 01/07/2009 at 3:16am - intimacy - by sexaddict - Sent from mobile version

Today, my best friend invited me to dinner at his house. When I went to the toilet, I found my wife's wedding ring in a cup, which she'd lost a week ago. FML

#619
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29210) - you deserved it (1251)

On 12/28/2008 at 8:41pm - misc - by pop - Sent from mobile version

Today, I decided to spend a night of love with my darling, so I arranged to meet him in a very classy hotel, gave him the room number and waited in a super-sexy outfit. There was a knock at the door, so I opened it enticingly, convinced it was him. It was room service. FML

#457
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25191) - you deserved it (9588)

On 12/05/2008 at 11:54pm - intimacy - by vaness@ - Sent from mobile version

Today, during a never-ending dinner with really boring friends, I faked being tired and told my husband, "Let’s go honey, we have a long way to drive home." He looks at me and says, "Well… we are at home." FML

#238
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12859) - you deserved it (58176)

On 11/07/2008 at 12:47am - misc - by alice5000 - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: