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brittnimj

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  • Number of visits : 133
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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brittnimj's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up, only to fine my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

#19602885
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20044) - you deserved it (4593)

On 05/10/2012 at 3:14pm - misc - by Amy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

today I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

#19589899
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22115) - you deserved it (6318)

On 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

TODAY , I AD FOOD POISONING. WEN I WAS FINALLY ABLE TO DRAG MYSELF TO TE KITCEN FOR SOME GATORADE , I GOT STUNG BY A WASP. FML

#19575961
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24279) - you deserved it (2034)

On 05/05/2012 at 3:19am - health - by markzar - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on mah dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whrld around an yelld ( BOO! ) causing me to scream lyk a little bitch. FML

#19263834
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7067) - you deserved it (33380)

On 03/12/2012 at 10:55am - misc - by gengiskarn69 (man) - United States

Today... While Making Mah Daily Offering Of Turd To The Porcelain Throne... I Took Out Mah Phone And Startd Playing A Game. I Suddenly Felt A Tickling Sensation On Mah Leg... And I Freakd Out As I Saw Hundreds Of Ants Had Emergd From Behind The Toilet. FML

#19215354
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30532) - you deserved it (3966)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, an African-American family cummed into the restaurant athich I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17257) - you deserved it (29619)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decidd to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me 4 over an hour. "How about being frd?" mega FML

 Today , my mom is marrying my ex boyfriend's dad. The same ex boyfriendho I caught cheating on me with my sister. Family gatherings are going to be such a joy! mega FML

#17793249
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42168) - you deserved it (2500)

On 09/21/2011 at 1:53am - misc - by AL - United States (California)

TODAY, I GOT A CALL FROM MAH DAUGHTER'S SCHOOL SAYING THAT SHE HAD BEAT SOMEONE UP. SHE'S 4. FML

#17746655
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28018) - you deserved it (5616)

On 09/14/2011 at 8:21pm - kids - by unknown - United States (Massachusetts)

Today , thinking I was alone in a public bathroom , I started singing the words to mah favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush , so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML

#17439919
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13179) - you deserved it (33617)

On 08/11/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by bathroomgirl (woman) - United States (California)

after having mah car been broken into the day before cuz I didn't lock it, I made sure I locked mah doors. When I got off shift and entered the parking lot, I noticed a brick had been thrown through mah windshield and a note that said, "Nice Try". FML

#17037512
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39153) - you deserved it (3110)

On 07/09/2011 at 3:04am - misc - by JohnyP - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to go meet my new upstars neigbor, only to fine out nobody actually moved in. Te noises tat ave been coming from up tere were made by rats. Lots of tem. FML

#7299222
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28448) - you deserved it (2039)

On 01/12/2010 at 12:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

yesterday I took a box of Halloween decorations down from te attic . Inside, were a bunc of fake spiders . I emptied te box onto te floor and te "fake" spiders crawled all over te living room in opposite directions . FML

#5848381
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38242) - you deserved it (4820)

On 10/16/2009 at 4:44am - animals - by Halloweenie (man) - United States (Hawaii)

today I was playing FarmTown and got into a fight with a 14 year old boy. I threatened him with physical violence and he reported me. I'm 23 years old and got banned from a virtual farming game fir threatening children. fat FML

#5841852
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7544) - you deserved it (57440)

On 10/15/2009 at 1:04pm - kids - by hatelittleboys (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today , I thought it would be fun to tease mah dog by standing above her an hitting each of her paws repeatedly. My dog thought it would be fun to jump up an bite at mah chest whilst I wasn't wereing a shrt. I just spent four hours in hospital getting mah nipple sewn back on. FML

#5289656
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11534) - you deserved it (80507)

On 09/16/2009 at 9:24am - animals - by nipped (man) - Australia (Victoria)



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