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bridgid96

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bridgid96
  • Town/Country : Ny,Ny, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 842
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About bridgid96 : Hey what's up

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bridgid96's favorite FMLs

Today, my Axe shampoo, body wash, and deodorant finally did their job: they got a girl to notice me. Too bad the girl was my grandma. FML

#21047196
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34180) - you deserved it (11054)

On 02/01/2014 at 1:37pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

#21044971
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47287) - you deserved it (5528)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my friend I would pay him to ask out the ugliest girl he knew. He asked out my girlfriend. FML

#21039900
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23433) - you deserved it (46233)

On 01/25/2014 at 7:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was going to have sex, so I went to my basement to get my builder bear that I had stuffed my condoms in. The bear was gone. My dad gave it to charity. 5ML

#21037839
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40307) - you deserved it (13667)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

#21031414
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47293) - you deserved it (8639)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 7-year-old daughter made a new game: hitting me in the groin when I'm not expecting it. She hunts me in the house, hides around corners, and behind furniture to ambush me. She'll even do it if she catches me napping. I'm a grown man living in fear of a little girl. FML

#21029770
335 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48893) - you deserved it (10474)

On 01/16/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my friends and I went camping in the woods. I fell asleep first. Waking up hours later to them bunched up together in the middle of the tent and me half-way outside, I confronted them about it. They admitted, "We heard a bear so we needed a sacrifice." FML

#21020901
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46069) - you deserved it (4928)

On 01/07/2014 at 11:37pm - misc - by bear food - United States (California)

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

#21008990
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23617) - you deserved it (49592)

On 12/29/2013 at 2:01am - kids - by ConfusedDad - United States

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

#21008605
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43065) - you deserved it (3051)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, I did the "walk of shame" sixteen blocks. It wouldn't have been so bad if the sidewalks and streets weren't completely covered in ice. Somewhere along the way I lost what little dignity I had left, along with my left shoe. FML

#21000521
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33383) - you deserved it (8654)

On 12/21/2013 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up to a loud crashing in the middle of the night. I went to investigate, but found nothing amiss. Nothing except an axe firmly wedged in my front door, that is. It's safe to say that I have no clue who did it, and that I needed a fresh pair of underwear. FML

#20999316
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40590) - you deserved it (2075)

On 12/20/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by nopissleft (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML

#20985190
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44642) - you deserved it (4864)

On 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after having some drinks at the club, I went home with this awesome girl. When I woke up, I thought the house looked really familiar. It belonged to my ex's younger sister. FML

#20970124
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45146) - you deserved it (16440)

On 11/25/2013 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by sister sister - United States (New York)

Today, my mom visited. While she was using the bathroom, my man-child of a husband thought it would be funny to knock on the bathroom door with his penis, thinking it was me in there. She opened the door to find him standing there doing the "helicopter". FML

#20969751
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51655) - you deserved it (5416)

On 11/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by LadyLola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in my room playing with my pet. I told my snake, "Who needs friends when I have you?" Through the wall I heard my neighbors say, "You do." I've never met my neighbors. FML

#20949324
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38139) - you deserved it (7803)

On 11/07/2013 at 6:08pm - misc - by Where is the faith in Humanity - United States (Washington)



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