Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

brendazelada

Search for a member

brendazelada
  • Town/Country : Victoia, Australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 16 February 1993 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 1001
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About brendazelada : brenda bee :)
"don't promise me the world when i already live in it"
"what you give is what you get"
:) I'm friendly so feel free to talk love meeting new people

brendazelada's last visitors

poor_gurll1198Sinester69infinitegraceimshadyxoKain713isallwaysmecryssycakesx3allThatallDaysierraaaa

brendazelada's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of brendazelada's badges

brendazelada's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from work to find the front door wide open, the stove on, my 5 year old cutting up the curtain, and my 2 year old smearing chocolate sauce on the floor. My fiancé was nowhere to be found. Later on, I got a text from him saying that he'd gone to watch the footy. FML

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

#17939452
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21311) - you deserved it (4681)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:53pm - kids - by hairless - Canada (Quebec)

Today, working as a life guard, I walked through the changing room to go back to the pool. On the way, a naked old man started up a conversation with me. We talked for 10 minutes about pool chemicals, while his penis wobbled around with every small movement. This happens all the time. FML

#17927200
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21702) - you deserved it (2805)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:58am - work - by Dr.Octopus454 (man) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, my husband gave my cellphone number to his most obnoxious, creepiest friend. I've been drunken-dialed five times already. FML

#17916897
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17898) - you deserved it (1726)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by grubbieduc - United States (California)

Today, my husband gave my cellphone number to his most obnoxious, creepiest friend. I've been drunken-dialed five times already. FML

#17916897
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17898) - you deserved it (1726)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by grubbieduc - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend I had an appointment for laser hair removal. He responded by making "pew pew" noises and pretending to shoot my underarms. He's 28. FML

#17916537
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11973) - you deserved it (24140)

On 10/05/2011 at 11:59pm - health - by pixiebubz - Australia

Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML

#17913530
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27255) - you deserved it (5394)

On 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by Pookaa (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I told a guy at work about my boyfriend. His immediate response was to ask me if I was making him up. He's the third person to react this way. FML

#17910892
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23972) - you deserved it (3320)

On 10/05/2011 at 12:03pm - work - by UglyApparently (woman) - United Kingdom (Leeds)

Today, after a long bike-ride home, I thought my roommate was being a douche and holding the door shut to our apartment. After about ten minutes of shoulder-slamming and name calling, I discovered that I just wasn't turning the key all the way, which I found out when my roomie came home. FML

#17909794
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5770) - you deserved it (28005)

On 10/05/2011 at 4:59am - misc - by nooooooooob - United States (Nevada)

Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML

#17906392
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26690) - you deserved it (2507)

On 10/04/2011 at 8:14pm - love - by Nickolas Neffster - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my younger cousin bought his girlfriend of 3 months a bunch of flowers. The only flower I've ever got from my boyfriend of 3 years is a plastic one he found on the floor in a bar. FML

#17904987
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20918) - you deserved it (3702)

On 10/04/2011 at 5:08pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a girl wearing a Nirvana shirt. Since Nirvana has been my favorite band for a long time, I tried striking up a conversation with her. Turns out she doesn't even listen to them, and only bought the shirt because she "liked the smiley face." FML

#17902155
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24752) - you deserved it (4430)

On 10/04/2011 at 4:57am - misc - by storksleuth (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my roommate informed me that one of her scorpions is loose in our apartment again. Great. FML

#17895796
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27740) - you deserved it (2733)

On 10/03/2011 at 1:58pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML

#17893570
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30466) - you deserved it (2670)

On 10/03/2011 at 2:08am - misc - by TheAnnoyedNeighbor - United States (New York)

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

#17892835
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31119) - you deserved it (5143)

On 10/03/2011 at 12:26am - kids - by Ramis182 (man) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: