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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was sitting in social studies and someone threw a note at me. It said "Go fuck yourself, everyone hates you, just die." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36598) - you deserved it (3523)
On 02/16/2011 at 10:30am - misc - by oheyimsarahh - United States
Today, I had a panic attack because my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to choke me in the middle of sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28850) - you deserved it (3961)
On 01/09/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I failed my driving test. I've been a legal driver in my home country for 8 years, but can't pass the test here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15282) - you deserved it (9625)
On 11/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27604) - you deserved it (15698)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the cracks. I quickly looked away, and about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26021) - you deserved it (1714)
On 09/25/2010 at 11:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my boss fired me because he said I was spending too much time surfing the internet. When I reminded him that my work computer isn't even networked, he said, "Oh, sorry, you're the one who takes too many smoke breaks." When I told him that I don't even smoke, he said, "Just go..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (49445) - you deserved it (2505)
On 06/08/2010 at 3:11am - work - by Myzyri (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31853) - you deserved it (5916)
On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, a man I don't know came up to me and started screaming about how "all you damn Mexicans were stealing American's jobs" and he stormed off. I'm Native American, and I'm pretty sure we've been here longer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39232) - you deserved it (2808)
On 01/21/2010 at 7:45pm - misc - by hardtotell (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, I got a text from my boyfriend that said, "Last week was the most embarassing time of my life, we're over." He was of course referring to the seizure that I had due to my epilepsy at Olive Garden. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31516) - you deserved it (1554)
On 10/29/2009 at 7:44pm - love - by Allie (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my mum started yelling at me for leaving scissors on my desk, which my five year old sister found and chopped all her hair off. She had a lump of hair as proof. After three minutes of her yelling, me crying and apologizing, she laughed and said she was joking. She just cut my sister's hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34682) - you deserved it (3426)
On 10/18/2009 at 11:27am - kids - by hairdresser (woman) - Thailand (Krung Thep)
Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13063) - you deserved it (53422)
On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States
Today, I used a porta-potty. After I came out, my mom came out of one and said "I really wish I could wash my hands." I explained that I used the little soap bar that was on the side of the toilet in mine. She told me that was a urinal and the soap bar was a disinfectant bar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11419) - you deserved it (41265)
On 06/15/2009 at 2:08am - misc - by hockeyfanaticx87 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I locked my keys in my car. After spending 20 minutes on the phone with AAA, and then waiting a half hour, the guy showed up, he stuck his hand in the drivers side window and asked, "You couldn't just reach in?" I forgot I left the window open. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7607) - you deserved it (74472)
On 04/17/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by .... (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, driving some friends back from a party I said, "Did everyone see Lisa totally hanging off of Pat tonight?! It was hilarious!!". There was a long silence, then one of my friends said "...you know Lisa is in the car, right?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (12306) - you deserved it (71631)
On 03/19/2009 at 11:41pm - misc - by StephD (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (129812) - you deserved it (8231)
On 03/09/2009 at 3:30pm - intimacy - by tamponmayhem (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
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