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boredomkillscows's favorite FMLs
by hannahj88 / 10/16/2010 at 12:41am / Australia / Work
by huwauw / 09/17/2010 at 4:33pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/08/2010 at 7:24am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Health
Today, I thought it would be funny to moon people out of my friend's car window. I rolled down the window and mooned a random couple. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I had to get out of the car and pick up my phone and wallet, which were in my back pocket. FML
by fullmoonfml / 08/12/2010 at 7:05pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation
by ShowOff / 03/11/2010 at 3:13am / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend and I went to the park. I bet my friend I could fit into the swing that was sized for toddlers. I managed to fit in, but I couldn't get out. My friend had to call 911 to get me out. When they finally did, the fireman told me that fat ladies shouldn't try stuff like that. FML
by fatlady / 03/07/2010 at 12:41am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
by Anonymous / 03/02/2010 at 4:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Obsessed / 01/30/2010 at 3:54pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to buy some spray paint for a project. I've never used a spray can before, so I decided to try it on paper provided. Unfortunately I didn't hold the can the right way and ended up with black, permanent, paint all over my face in the middle of a store. FML
by muffincakess / 01/20/2010 at 7:55pm / Miscellaneous
Today, while on the treadmill, my iPod fell and shot out underneath my feet. I got off to get it, and when I tried to get back on, I slipped and fell on my face on the moving track. The whole gym watched me get beat up by a treadmill and clapped when I finally got back on. FML
by i-should-probably-stick-to-swimming / 01/03/2010 at 11:28am / United States (California) / Health
Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom yelling, "Mommy-mommy that lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML
by n/a / 11/25/2009 at 2:36am / United States / Kids
by buhknee / 11/24/2009 at 7:08pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, like many other days, I fell asleep in math class. Unlike other days, however, I woke up with a start while ripping a really loud fart in my sleep. The whole class heard it because it was during a lecture. Even the teacher was laughing at me and I had to walk, no, run out of the room. FML
by Anonymous / 11/24/2009 at 12:57am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, after drunk texting a girl the night before, I sent her a message saying I was sorry for everything I said. All she could say back? "Those were some of the most normal drunk texts I have ever read. I'd hate to see how boring you'd be sober." FML
by Anonymous / 10/24/2009 at 10:58am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous
by Xia / 10/18/2009 at 12:38pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I found out that the neighborhood call-girl my husband and I secretly joke about is the same… Today, I came home from a night out with the lads. My girlfriend refused to make love to me, saying… Today, while enjoying a truly epic move from my wife in the hotel shower, I managed to accidentally…