Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

boone

Search for a member

boone

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 23078
  • Number of comments : 132
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About boone : I am excellent.

boone's page activity

Visits<b>LeMoan</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 2:08am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 3:07pm<b>SlySkillZ</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 3:28pm<b>Terzy</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 4:22pm<b>Ash_Used_Splash</b> - the 04/04/2013 at 7:18am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:16pm<b>AHX</b> - the 01/13/2010 at 8:37pm<b>Pankreas</b> - the 12/29/2009 at 7:11pm<b>Peroxide</b> - the 12/23/2009 at 9:03pm<b>spanishflirt6509</b> - the 12/16/2009 at 5:20pm<b>_phonesex_</b> - the 12/15/2009 at 10:19pm<b>rockmyworld</b> - the 12/09/2009 at 11:39pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/30/2009 at 4:20pm<b>avfcfan89</b> - the 11/10/2009 at 11:01pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 10/19/2009 at 6:19pm<b>redbluegreen</b> - the 10/08/2009 at 10:47am<b>plexico</b> - the 10/01/2009 at 11:09am<b>nonentity21</b> - the 09/29/2009 at 2:41pm

boone's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

boone's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML

#4619260
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73768) - you deserved it (5887)

On 08/18/2009 at 1:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty. I had to pee, and thought maybe she would learn by watching me use it. Everything was going well, until I realized that I had a long pee. So long that it overfilled her potty all over. FML

#4577302
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13568) - you deserved it (57430)

On 08/16/2009 at 5:05pm - kids - by Overflow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty. I had to pee, and thought maybe she would learn by watching me use it. Everything was going well, until I realized that I had a long pee. So long that it overfilled her potty all over. FML

#4577302
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13568) - you deserved it (57430)

On 08/16/2009 at 5:05pm - kids - by Overflow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

#4499384
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67896) - you deserved it (7617)

On 08/13/2009 at 11:23am - intimacy - by esb (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my brother found 100 bucks in his coat pocket. He was so happy he bought 2 new games for his x-box. He was borrowing my coat. FML

#4299043
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45167) - you deserved it (7739)

On 08/05/2009 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a friend offered to have sex with me, since I'm a 19 year old virgin who's only been kissed. He then added on that I would have to give him my Wii in return. FML

#4159325
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45154) - you deserved it (6216)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:52am - intimacy - by VelocityMary (woman) - United States - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I told my therapist that I suspected my partner was unfaithful, but I don't think he believed me. "What, did you find a membership card to a sex club in his wallet or something?" he asked. When I got home, I looked in my partner's wallet. I found a membership card to a sex club. FML

#4158714
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46901) - you deserved it (4102)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:21am - intimacy - by thesockmancometh (man) - United States (Texas) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

#4158002
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57310) - you deserved it (17215)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I tried to be sexy and put a condom on with my mouth. Instead, I inhaled it and my boyfriend broke three of my ribs giving me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

#4155124
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21843) - you deserved it (53876)

On 07/30/2009 at 5:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, my 9 year old nephew found his way onto my iTunes. I now have 401 songs titled "aidfj3P" by "ffjiel". FML

#3115220
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55899) - you deserved it (6606)

On 06/22/2009 at 9:32am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, my brother and I found a little bird that couldn't fly. While trying to convince my mom that it couldn't fly so we could keep it, I lightly tossed it in the air and it landed a few feet in front of me. Then my cat grabbed it and ate it. FML

#3110459
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19503) - you deserved it (44710)

On 06/22/2009 at 2:06am - animals - by Ketchup (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was shopping for my little sister's birthday. She loves manga. I've never read manga, so I bought a couple of novels from the "popular" shelf. Turns out if they have white covers it means they are "adult" books. I bought my sister a "lolicon" manga - filled with prebuscent naked girls. FML

#3097066
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34972) - you deserved it (20065)

On 06/21/2009 at 6:10pm - kids - by loli-conned (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1165147) - you deserved it (125755)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: