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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be sexy if he bit me on the lips. Normally, I would have enjoyed it, if the lips in question were the ones on my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31894) - you deserved it (3363)
On 08/27/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by RainCl0ud - United States (California)
Today, thinking I was alone in a public bathroom, I started singing the words to my favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush, so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9999) - you deserved it (23295)
On 08/11/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by bathroomgirl (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16113) - you deserved it (51307)
On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I met up with an old high school friend who I used to make fun of because he put so much effort into his studies. Turns out he makes my annual salary in a month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5407) - you deserved it (8735)
On 12/24/2010 at 10:12am - money - by Anonymous - United States
Today, one of my usually unpleasant managers offered me a slice of cheese cake for doing a good job. I declined, but after some pestering on his part I finally accepted it. I have been violently ill for the past 2 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22254) - you deserved it (2915)
On 12/21/2010 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I went to the mall with my daughter. She asked me if she could go see Santa, so I said yes. She made me sit on his lap with her, and that's when I felt something on my bum. Let's just say Santa had a present for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30746) - you deserved it (4709)
On 12/19/2010 at 7:23pm - intimacy - by hotmommy -
Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29249) - you deserved it (5184)
On 10/21/2010 at 11:20am - misc - by maddiee. (woman) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex in a rarely used room at school. We got carried away and found ourselves locked in. We slept there overnight. We woke up when the cleaning lady found us the next morning and were greeted by worried parents and school staff. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9484) - you deserved it (33418)
On 08/26/2010 at 5:17pm - intimacy - by Eeeek (woman) - Bulgaria (Varna)
Today, I called my boyfriend just to hear his voice since I haven't seen him in a while. His mom picked up and said "Chris isn't here right now, he's with his girlfriend. Do you want to leave him a message." We've been dating for 4 and a half months now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28500) - you deserved it (3047)
On 08/10/2010 at 12:30am - love - by llmd (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got a 95 on my term project. To congratulate me, my boyfriend said we're having sex tonight. I only get laid if I get good grades. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17900) - you deserved it (4361)
On 03/04/2010 at 10:48am - intimacy - by lalararara - United States
Today, I saw my crush standing at the bus stop. I did the "I'm talking to someone on the phone thing," trying to be cool. Halfway through the conversation my phone actually rang, I quickly answered but it was my mom on loudspeaker yelling, "Did you bring your tampons?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (7696) - you deserved it (25272)
On 02/20/2010 at 8:58am - misc - by Rach (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I got in a car accident on the way to the DMV to take my drivers test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15504) - you deserved it (6580)
On 12/31/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I came home from a year long backpacking trip in Europe. During my absence my parents divorced, dad took the house and most of the money, sister is seven months pregnant, brother was arrested for statutory rape, and my mom pawned all my stuff to buy booze to "cope." Oh, and my fish died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70274) - you deserved it (3935)
On 12/28/2009 at 7:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out where all my expensive bras and panties have been disappearing to. Apparently, while I'm at work, my fifteen year-old son's girlfriend has been stealing them after they have sex in my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17123) - you deserved it (2097)
On 12/21/2009 at 10:28pm - intimacy - by Secretisout (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was opening up to my close friend about my low self esteem. To make me feel better, he told me that he gets a boner whenever he walks behind me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13578) - you deserved it (5147)
On 11/27/2009 at 4:20am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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