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blinksmilewink

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blinksmilewink
  • Town/Country : Bath, UK
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 2 September 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 1609
  • Number of comments : 94
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About blinksmilewink : FML.

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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blinksmilewink's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in bed with my cat on my lap. No one was around, so I felt comfortable enough to let out a huge fart. What I didn't expect was my cat jumping up and then clawing and biting my crotch. FML

#6971032
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11246) - you deserved it (24074)

On 12/27/2009 at 8:04am - animals - by axwound (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I stepped outside for a smoke. It was 1 a.m. Thinking no one was around, I let out a series of loud, nasty-sounding farts. I looked over to my left to see the neighbor, whom I've never met, also smoking, and staring at me. That was his first impression of me. FML

#6915702
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8284) - you deserved it (27405)

On 12/24/2009 at 2:00am - misc - by FlGirl (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom and I were going to the store. I decided to stay in the car while she went in. In the car next to me, there was a dog in the driver's seat barking at me. Bored, I barked back at it until I realized there was someone in the passenger's seat watching me. FML

#6896062
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6550) - you deserved it (26903)

On 12/23/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by ApolloandDixie (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop and I noticed that there was a bug on the guys face in front of me. Trying to be nice I lightly smacked it off. His reaction was to punch me in the face. Repeatedly. FML

#6826579
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7619) - you deserved it (37002)

On 12/19/2009 at 11:07am - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (California)

Today, I showed up on set for a film that I booked a role in weeks ago. At the time of the audition, the script was being rewritten, so today I was so excited and eager to be told what my role would entail. When they handed me the script, my character was described as a fat, ugly, awkward girl. FML

#6677293
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21273) - you deserved it (4223)

On 12/09/2009 at 6:13am - work - by okaythen6 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw a moth trapped in a spider web. Feeling gracious, I gently freed it, and then took it to the window to let it out. When I opened the window to set him free, my $300 air conditioner fell two stories and smashed on the sidewalk. The moth flew away. FML

#6598965
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11084) - you deserved it (29492)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:23pm - animals - by oops (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, a mall cop tore up my 'Free hugs' sign. FML

#6489895
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29735) - you deserved it (14123)

On 11/28/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Cornbreesha (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I drove from Seattle, WA to Vancouver, BC for the Three Days Grace concert. I was so excited when I found the building. There was a big readerboard that flashed "THREE DAYS GRACE" and I cheered. Then it flashed "CANCELLED." FML

Today, I was running a meeting feeling very stressed. I grabbed my stress ball out of my bag, squeezing it vigorously throughout the meeting. When I stood up to talk my stress ball exploded all over my new black suit and the desk. So much for relieving stress. FML

#6337825
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21254) - you deserved it (3471)

On 11/17/2009 at 2:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the city shut off the water at my house because my roommate thought that the water bills he had been hoarding were "suggestions." FML

#6118488
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25849) - you deserved it (2620)

On 11/02/2009 at 12:30pm - money - by parched (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was driving my child to school when the car let out a huge bang. It shuddered to a halt. My son started laughing. I asked him what was funny but he wouldn't tell me. The car wouldn't start. I called RACV and they told me the problem. My son had rolled 9 golf balls into the exhaust pipe. FML

#6095339
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27619) - you deserved it (3064)

On 11/01/2009 at 1:44am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found my brand new tropical fish dead in its tank because my boyfriend got drunk last night and decided to pour red wine into the aquarium. FML

#5968472
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27727) - you deserved it (2875)

On 10/24/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Brinty (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was finishing up my art project that was due the next day. I was really tired and fell asleep on my table. Three hours later, I woke up to find my project torn to bits. I went out and saw my cat vomitting out feathers and other materials I used for my project. FML

#5270344
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28452) - you deserved it (7067)

On 09/15/2009 at 9:21am - animals - by Meow (woman) - Singapore

Today, my mom noticed that my bike chain was rusty so she decided to clean it without telling me about her good deed. She forgot to tighten it when she put it back on so when I tried riding later it locked up and I ended up smashing my nuts. My doctor told me I have to ice them for a week. FML

#5231745
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30124) - you deserved it (1979)

On 09/13/2009 at 4:11pm - health - by triplem (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got my renewed driver's license. It clearly indicates 'Sex: F'. My beard and penis beg to differ. FML

#5081396
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42953) - you deserved it (3335)

On 09/06/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by HeShe (man) - United States (Tennessee)



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