blinksmilewink

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Offline (the 02/18/2016 at 6:05pm)

blinksmilewink

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 2 September 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4077
  • Number of comments : 94
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About blinksmilewink : FML.

blinksmilewink's page activity

Visits<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 12:26am<b>emilyh7689</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 11:23pm<b>witebted</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 7:13pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 9:38pm<b>H3LL_K1D</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 8:22am<b>qdawg06</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 2:15pm<b>jazjack12325</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 11:32pm<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 9:41am<b>delude</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 10:40pm<b>Equinoxxa</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 5:39pm<b>xXjakobXx</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 10:42pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 12:37am<b>FindingYujin</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 7:43pm<b>zeppelinzoso</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 6:33pm<b>shadowofbong</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 4:22pm<b>iLynz</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 11:14pm<b>LiiaaBee</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 12:25pm<b>Offspring</b> - the 04/13/2013 at 12:01pm

Fucked!<b>qdawg06</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 8:16pm

blinksmilewink's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of blinksmilewink's badges

blinksmilewink's favorite FMLs

Today, I was home alone and I started to sing Halo by Beyonce. I was starting to get into it and began singing with more passion until the phone rang. It was my neighbor begging me to please shut the hell up. FML

by Ricky / 08/16/2009 at 9:00pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was just too hot. I stripped down and, being home alone, pranced around nude, lip synching and playing air guitar to some music. I was getting really into when I opened my eyes and looked out the window to see an old man with binoculars on his terrace. He wasn't birdwatching. FML

by PeepShow / 08/06/2009 at 2:04am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, a moth was flying around my house. Annoyed, I picked up a shoe to crush it with. The moth landed on a light fixture on the ceiling, so I made my move. Dead, the moth slipped gracefully through air and onto my head. So did the light fixture. FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2009 at 5:20pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a cool new pair of sunglasses. I wore them today, and all day I kept getting comments about how much I looked like Ozzy Osbourne and John Lennon. I'm a girl. FML

by poop_mcqueen / 07/30/2009 at 2:51am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a man held a door open for me while I fished my umbrella out of my very cluttered bag. As I was opening my umbrella, I turned to thank him for being such a gentleman. Instead, a tampon that had apparently wedged itself into the folds of my umbrella flew into his face. FML

by umbrella / 07/24/2009 at 7:39am / United States (District of Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to put a pretzel on my forehead while I was sleeping on the beach. I now have a pretzel-shaped tan line in the middle of my head. FML

by joe1234 / 07/16/2009 at 10:28pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called my boyfriend and when he answered, I said the dirtiest thing I could think of to him on the phone. After a long silence, I heard, "Lacey? Is that you?" I accidentally called my dad. FML

by crazyt446 / 07/11/2009 at 11:13am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

by Jeweler / 06/26/2009 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at football practice, my teammates and I were on water break. At the bus barn next to the field, a good-looking girl was washing a bus. Some of the guys started to yell pick-up lines at her from 50 yards away, and pretty soon I chime in. She turns around. It was my younger sister. FML

by nail714 / 06/25/2009 at 1:02am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got myself a cool pair of colored contacts. I was wearing them while at home, so that I'll get used to them. Then I had to go to a job interview. I forgot to take them out. I went to a job interview with zebra-print eyes. FML

by creepyeyes / 06/21/2009 at 2:37pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

by Shaun / 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I was at the waterpark. I decided to go down a slide shaped like a funnel. On the way down, my bikini bottom untied. Then I got lodged in a V shape, arse first, in the hole at the funnel exit, exposing myself to the entire pool until I could slither out. FML

by canadiankc / 06/03/2009 at 10:14pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Miscellaneous

Today, my kitten was playing with the drawstring on my pajama pants. He then jumped, clinging on to my crotch. I screamed in pain, which scared him and made him hold on tighter. My cat was literally hanging from my vagina with its claws for a good 30 seconds before I could pry him off. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2009 at 6:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, was my sister's and dad's birthday. I accidentally mixed up the gifts I got for them and my dad ended up with a vibrator. He wasn't very happy. FML

by silvercity09 / 05/25/2009 at 11:04pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my Grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box,"Face this side toward crowd for best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on it's side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML

by Tyler_Padgett / 05/24/2009 at 7:52pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous