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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I found out just how thin the walls at my new student flat are. They are so thin in fact, that I can hear the creepy guy next door say my full name over and over again very slowly whilst masturbating rigorously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (84977) - you deserved it (2927)
On 06/09/2009 at 9:36am - intimacy - by SleepyKirsty (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55726) - you deserved it (136004)
On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)
Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, i had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. right when i finished, i ran out of gas. My 83 year old grandmother saw. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8160) - you deserved it (57248)
On 04/26/2009 at 4:12am - misc - by waltzy777 - United States (Indiana)
Today, I met this guy I really liked at a party. We got chatting and then hit the dance floor. We had a "moment" and I went in to kiss him. He shot forward with his tongue already out. His eyes were open. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38885) - you deserved it (6766)
On 04/25/2009 at 8:18am - misc - by plasticfantastic - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, I pulled over to help a girl with her car. I thought my limited mechanic skills would help look like a hero. She only needed her coolant cap unscrewed. With top down, shirt off, I was confident as I got out of my car. 10 minutes later I left because I couldn't unscrew the f***ing thing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8694) - you deserved it (43743)
On 04/23/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by edhalen (man) - United States
Today, a woman drove through my house. She was texting and eating watermelon at the same time. I didn't know that was even possible, but now my house is condemned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (87605) - you deserved it (2862)
On 04/12/2009 at 9:53am - health - by Fitz (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, while working at a Subway store right next to a big hospital, there was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I asked the next person in line, "I'll bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30775) - you deserved it (56851)
On 04/05/2009 at 9:48am - work - by 00Evan (man) - Australia (Queensland)
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