About blaackandprouud : About me:
~KENYAN-CANADIAN~
I like music, hip hop dance, singing and school. I'm a Pentecostal Christian. And I want to be a doctor.
Other stuff I like: Family Guy, HIMYM, Regular Show, Adventure Time, a truckload of mystery/crime solving shows, A$AP Rocky, Kanye West, Frank Ocean, The Game, OFWGKTA other rappers that I'm to lazy to write down, Rihanna, MJ, Beyonce, Carrie Underwood, reddit, imgur, laughing, being with family or friends, being right and being a douche sometimes.
Just for the heck of it, I'll put some things I really hate (this list will definitely grow):
-Taylor Swift***
-Selena Gomez
-ants
-Jennifer Lopez
-the colour pink
-Katy Perry
-Westboro Baptist Church
-guns
-stereotypes
-country music
I NEED to know!
You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Today, my roommate came out of the bathroom, and asked me how the scales knew her weight in both pounds and kilos, even though "the exchange rate is always changing." I actually live with this idiot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15688) - you deserved it (1219)
On 09/22/2012 at 3:29am - misc - by ak_6694 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, a stranger called me, saying I look hot in the bra I was wearing. When I hung up, thinking it was a joke, I opened the back door, and saw a man running away from my backyard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22444) - you deserved it (1211)
On 09/19/2012 at 1:02pm - misc - by jitiizer (woman) - Netherlands (Friesland)
Today, I went for my follow-up appointment with my surgeon. He walked into the room and said, "I thought you died." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20207) - you deserved it (1043)
On 09/17/2012 at 7:25am - health - by Missusluv313 (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend, when he suggested that I might want to buy a new loofah. When I asked why, he admitted he's been using it to scrub his ass crack for weeks. I use that loofah to wash my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18187) - you deserved it (1608)
On 09/16/2012 at 3:48pm - health - by Derp McShitstain (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)
Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36703) - you deserved it (2910)
On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, during my uncle's funeral, my four year old loudly asked, "Where's all the dead people?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (13116) - you deserved it (1408)
On 09/06/2012 at 9:56pm - kids - by Chouse - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted, "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25422) - you deserved it (928)
On 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, while on my morning jog, I turned a corner, and out of nowhere, the business end of a bicycle hit me straight in the nuts. As I collapsed, gasping in agony, the guy who just killed a hundred million of my potential children got back on his bike and cycled away without a word. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16490) - you deserved it (1217)
On 08/12/2012 at 7:08pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I realized that if I died tomorrow, the only photos available for my funeral would be crappy family Christmas portraits, acne-filled yearbook photos, and several pictures from my MySpace days, where I'm sporting coontails and looking paler than Edward Cullen's ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13310) - you deserved it (6456)
On 08/12/2012 at 1:31pm - misc - by kherien (woman) - United States
Today, I realized that if I died tomorrow, the only photos available for my funeral would be crappy family Christmas portraits, acne-filled yearbook photos, and several pictures from my MySpace days, where I'm sporting coontails and looking paler than Edward Cullen's ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13310) - you deserved it (6456)
On 08/12/2012 at 1:31pm - misc - by kherien (woman) - United States
Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19716) - you deserved it (1527)
On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my neighbor called me on vacation to tell me that she let my mother into my house to feed my fish. I don't have fish, and my mother passed away 3 years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25893) - you deserved it (1786)
On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -
Today, I found my husband's journal, and along with it the real reason he took so long to show up to our wedding rehearsals last year. According to the journal, it was because he was too busy wooing a married mother of five and sticking his "slut-banger all up in that fat booty." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23270) - you deserved it (2338)
On 07/20/2012 at 10:12pm - misc - by divorce? i think so (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29217) - you deserved it (3204)
On 07/14/2012 at 8:50pm - intimacy - by checkup (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)
Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3511) - you deserved it (34242)
On 07/14/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)
Monday 17 June 2013
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