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bitchpleasemike

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bitchpleasemike

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2034
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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bitchpleasemike's page activity

Visits<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 2:37am<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:24am<b>GotItWow</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 12:29am<b>silon5</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 6:07am<b>ThunderTheRad</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 5:59pm<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 7:32pm<b>bummervacation</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 1:59am<b>trinalporpus</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 11:55pm<b>bither95</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 7:41am<b>niatross</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 7:39pm<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 6:02am<b>max367</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 11:19pm<b>klondikeberry</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 2:58am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 1:04am<b>that_band_nerd</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 7:20pm<b>BassTurdo</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 4:11pm<b>starlight300</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 8:02pm<b>Live4funny</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 2:41am

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bitchpleasemike's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over breakfast. In the afternoon I got to smile at him prettily for hours because he was the photographer in a session neither of us could get out of. FML

#12677890
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29555) - you deserved it (2783)

On 08/22/2010 at 3:24am - love - by lee (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I found out that if you fall asleep in church, people will think you're having a spiritual moment, and you'll wake up to ten people praying for you. FML

#12438687
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26908) - you deserved it (12136)

On 08/10/2010 at 8:14pm - misc - by Zippermania9 (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was practising the violin in my apartment. A man knocked on the door and introduced himself with a smile, saying he wanted to know my "schedule." I replied, "I'm pretty busy but maybe we could get a drink sometime." To which he replied, "No, I just want to know when you'll stop." FML

#11960471
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21881) - you deserved it (18264)

On 07/18/2010 at 10:18am - misc - by holly (woman) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I was practising the violin in my apartment. A man knocked on the door and introduced himself with a smile, saying he wanted to know my "schedule." I replied, "I'm pretty busy but maybe we could get a drink sometime." To which he replied, "No, I just want to know when you'll stop." FML

#11960471
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21881) - you deserved it (18264)

On 07/18/2010 at 10:18am - misc - by holly (woman) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, while making out with my boyfriend of a month, he started rubbing my boobs. He told me that he wanted to get some action before he broke up with me. FML

#11624836
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45920) - you deserved it (5231)

On 07/03/2010 at 12:04am - intimacy - by nowsingle - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss fired me because he said I was spending too much time surfing the internet. When I reminded him that my work computer isn't even networked, he said, "Oh, sorry, you're the one who takes too many smoke breaks." When I told him that I don't even smoke, he said, "Just go..." FML

Today, I went on a first date, where my date managed to fall in a creek, take me to his house and measure my height, show me family pictures, and perform the Soulja Boy dance in his living room. All while wearing swim trunks because his pants were drying and he didn't have extras. FML

#10727772
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31528) - you deserved it (7108)

On 05/24/2010 at 2:13am - love - by gedderdunn - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to do something fun and spontaneous, so we had sex in the disabled toilet in the shopping centre. Little did we know, the male AND female toilets were conveniently being cleaned at the time, so the only toilet open was the disabled one. Walk of shame. FML

#10279492
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9213) - you deserved it (41108)

On 05/01/2010 at 8:12pm - intimacy - by sam (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, the girl I have been dating for the past couple months broke it off with me. She said she's tired of waiting around for me and being ignored in the mean time. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been so greedy as to finish my 2 degrees and work 2 jobs to pay for my school. How selfish of me. FML

#9175819
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31403) - you deserved it (17168)

On 03/18/2010 at 12:02am - love - by Lonely (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

#9040804
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25918) - you deserved it (8847)

On 03/13/2010 at 4:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, my mother stormed into my room shouting about how I never go anywhere and then tells me to go out "NOW" and do something. As she is pushing me out the door, her boyfriend walks in. FML

#8843088
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26932) - you deserved it (2353)

On 03/05/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by FatalxDesire599 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was awakened, in the middle of the night, by the sound of crying coming from outside. There's a mile in between houses where I live. FML

#8546580
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28255) - you deserved it (2193)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by holycow (man) - United States (California)

Today, after recently having had surgery, I Iearnt that some extra tissue was needed to cover up the hole in the roof of my mouth. Where did they get this tissue? From a dead person. I now have the flesh of a dead person in my mouth, which by the way is now infected. FML

#8361510
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37387) - you deserved it (3197)

On 02/17/2010 at 12:07am - health - by Sophie - United States (Texas)

Today, I switched cell phone carriers and got the plan where you can call or text any five people for free. The employee asked for my five, I could only come up with one, my mom. FML

#8193962
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22616) - you deserved it (4479)

On 02/13/2010 at 2:22am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

#8045354
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45131) - you deserved it (3042)

On 02/09/2010 at 7:22am - health - by SickSmick (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)



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