This member hasn't filled in the description.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over breakfast. In the afternoon I got to smile at him prettily for hours because he was the photographer in a session neither of us could get out of. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23856) - you deserved it (2036)
On 08/22/2010 at 3:24am - love - by lee (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, I found out that if you fall asleep in church, people will think you're having a spiritual moment, and you'll wake up to ten people praying for you. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20880) - you deserved it (9259)
On 08/10/2010 at 8:14pm - misc - by Zippermania9 (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was practising the violin in my apartment. A man knocks on the door and introduces himself with a smile, says he wants to know my "schedule." I reply, "I'm pretty busy but maybe we could get a drink sometime." To which he retorts, "No, I just want to know when you'll stop." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17075) - you deserved it (13449)
On 07/18/2010 at 10:18am - misc - by holly (woman) - Germany (Berlin)
Today, I was practising the violin in my apartment. A man knocks on the door and introduces himself with a smile, says he wants to know my "schedule." I reply, "I'm pretty busy but maybe we could get a drink sometime." To which he retorts, "No, I just want to know when you'll stop." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17075) - you deserved it (13449)
On 07/18/2010 at 10:18am - misc - by holly (woman) - Germany (Berlin)
Today, while making out with my boyfriend of a month, he started rubbing my boobs. He told me that he wanted to get some action before he broke up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40006) - you deserved it (4099)
On 07/03/2010 at 12:04am - intimacy - by nowsingle - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boss fired me because he said I was spending too much time surfing the internet. When I reminded him that my work computer isn't even networked, he said, "Oh, sorry, you're the one who takes too many smoke breaks." When I told him that I don't even smoke, he said, "Just go..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (52940) - you deserved it (3126)
On 06/08/2010 at 3:11am - work - by Myzyri (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went on a first date, where my date managed to fall in a creek, take me to his house and measure my height, show me family pictures, and perform the Soulja Boy dance in his living room. All while wearing swim trunks because his pants were drying and he didn't have extras. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25914) - you deserved it (5635)
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to do something fun and spontaneous, so we had sex in the disabled toilet in the shopping centre. Little did we know, the male AND female toilets were conveniently being cleaned at the time, so the only toilet open was the disabled one. Walk of shame. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7441) - you deserved it (29668)
On 05/01/2010 at 8:12pm - intimacy - by sam (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, the girl I have been dating for the past couple months broke it off with me. She said she's tired of waiting around for me and being ignored in the mean time. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been so greedy as to finish my 2 degrees and work 2 jobs to pay for my school. How selfish of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25036) - you deserved it (13414)
On 03/18/2010 at 12:02am - love - by Lonely (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20180) - you deserved it (6644)
On 03/13/2010 at 4:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)
Today, my mother stormed into my room shouting about how I never go anywhere and then tells me to go out "NOW" and do something. As she is pushing me out the door, her boyfriend walks in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20711) - you deserved it (1681)
On 03/05/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by FatalxDesire599 - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was awakened, in the middle of the night, by the sound of crying coming from outside. There's a mile in between houses where I live. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21265) - you deserved it (1509)
On 02/22/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by holycow (man) - United States (California)
Today, after recently having had surgery, I Iearnt that some extra tissue was needed to cover up the hole in the roof of my mouth. Where did they get this tissue? From a dead person. I now have the flesh of a dead person in my mouth, which by the way is now infected. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31591) - you deserved it (2776)
On 02/17/2010 at 12:07am - health - by Sophie - United States (Texas)
Today, while I was nearing completion on a ridiculously long assignment that was due in a few hours, my drunk roommate stumbled through the living room, tripped over my Ethernet cable, and yanked my laptop to the hardwood floor, breaking it in half. He then vomited upon the halves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24300) - you deserved it (1919)
On 02/16/2010 at 7:04am - misc - by timewilltell - United States (Michigan)
Today, I switched cell phone carriers and got the plan where you can call or text any five people for free. The employee asked for my five, I could only come up with one, my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17843) - you deserved it (3996)
On 02/13/2010 at 2:22am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
