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bitchpleasemike

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bitchpleasemike

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3251
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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bitchpleasemike's page activity

Visits<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 4:11am<b>Wazl</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 3:54pm<b>0XBlazeX0</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:42pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 6:16pm<b>doctor__who</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 11:46pm<b>RichHomieAlec</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 5:02pm<b>Sparta2424</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 4:33pm<b>mcspazz731</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 9:25pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 10:59pm<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 2:37am<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:24am<b>GotItWow</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 12:29am<b>silon5</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 6:07am<b>ThunderTheRad</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 5:59pm<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 7:32pm<b>bummervacation</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 1:59am<b>trinalporpus</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 11:55pm<b>bither95</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 7:41am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 11:16pm

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An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

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bitchpleasemike's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend of two years called me on Skype while he was taking a crap. Think it's a sign that maybe we've been dating for too long. FML

#14091257
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24599) - you deserved it (5262)

On 12/05/2010 at 1:35am - love - by fail (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend left me for my step-sister. He's been cheating on me with her for the past 6 months, and got her pregnant. I also found out that my stomach pains are due to the fact that I'm also pregnant. My family could officially qualify for Jerry Springer. FML

#14068536
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63138) - you deserved it (9257)

On 12/03/2010 at 3:56am - intimacy - by Annonmyus -

Today, I discovered my parents took me to a specialist when I was a baby because they thought I had a facial deformity. It turns out I'm just ugly. FML

#13990251
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35658) - you deserved it (2848)

On 11/26/2010 at 7:23pm - misc - by bleh (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, it was my 21st birthday. I had a simple party with my boyfriend, with just a cake and a bottle of red wine. My boyfriend managed to get so drunk that he danced naked for 10 minutes, then told me I'm hideously obese but that he loves me anyway. FML

#13825222
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30594) - you deserved it (5239)

On 11/13/2010 at 8:24am - love - by sadinmass (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time. While we were undressing each other, he said, "Wow, if we have children, you're gonna have to shave, or they'll die from rug-burn as they come out!" FML

#13654098
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35149) - you deserved it (27850)

On 10/30/2010 at 8:37pm - intimacy - by tht1chk - United States (California)

Today, talking to my boyfriend about each others families, we noticed we both had an aunt with the same name. After a while of trying to figure things out, we decide to call her. Turns out that we are long distance cousins. FML

#13558265
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53181) - you deserved it (4128)

On 10/23/2010 at 2:07am - love - by Oriianna Raiinbow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my co-worker insisted there must be an underlying, romantic reason for why I spend so much time teaching him everything, and that I didn't mean it when I told him that's what I'm paid to do. I'm actually supposed to train this guy for three weeks. Two more weeks to go. FML

#13547625
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23557) - you deserved it (2349)

On 10/22/2010 at 6:57am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year old son answered the door and when he saw me said, 'oh great, it's YOU' and slammed the door in my face. FML

#13300010
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26297) - you deserved it (4641)

On 10/03/2010 at 3:40am - kids - by notyouagain (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML

#13285940
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63941) - you deserved it (6051)

On 10/02/2010 at 4:07am - love - by Pr unlucky - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML

#13137769
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7631) - you deserved it (72417)

On 09/21/2010 at 12:49am - animals - by awesome - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dog used my stomach as a trampoline to jump onto the couch. I wouldn't have minded so much if I wasn't still recovering from having my appendix removed. FML

#13074561
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31760) - you deserved it (2578)

On 09/16/2010 at 2:50pm - health - by hmb - United States (Louisiana)

Today, while at dinner with my current boyfriend, my ex walked in with his new girlfriend. The waiter put them at the table next to ours, and the two of them had a front row seat to me spilling an entire guacamole salad on my lap out of nervousness. FML

#13045440
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (6170)

On 09/14/2010 at 3:57am - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after being with my boyfriend for seven years, he finally proposed. To another woman. FML

#12964178
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43869) - you deserved it (3806)

On 09/08/2010 at 3:46pm - love - by onthemarket (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I witnessed my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML

#12817288
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41920) - you deserved it (12957)

On 08/30/2010 at 3:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over breakfast. In the afternoon I got to smile at him prettily for hours because he was the photographer in a session neither of us could get out of. FML

#12677890
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29844) - you deserved it (2797)

On 08/22/2010 at 3:24am - love - by lee (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)



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