bitchpleasemike

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bitchpleasemike

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5035
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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bitchpleasemike's page activity

Visits<b>Artures_way1</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 10:29pm<b>arsh_fz</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 1:43am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 8:53pm<b>ackligtful</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 8:35pm<b>IronicLights</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 10:09pm<b>ARCHANGELGABRIEL</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 9:57pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 11:31am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 12:13am<b>Burton_Forever</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:03am<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 4:11am<b>Wazl</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 3:54pm<b>0XBlazeX0</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:42pm<b>doctor__who</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 11:46pm<b>RichHomieAlec</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 5:02pm<b>Sparta2424</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 4:33pm<b>mcspazz731</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 9:25pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 10:59pm<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 2:37am

Fucked!<b>ARCHANGELGABRIEL</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 3:57am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 11:16pm

bitchpleasemike's FML badges

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Who’s the fairest of them all?

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bitchpleasemike's favorite FMLs

Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML

by crushed dreams / 06/16/2011 at 2:20am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my aunt and I went shopping. When we got to the store, she said she forgot her wallet, and I told her I would buy some things for her. When we were at the checkout, I was a dollar short. She said, "Oh, I'll get it!" and pulled out her wallet. FML

by sarahwittman / 06/13/2011 at 6:29pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Money

Today, my ex husband is marrying my sister. FML

by uetlqdja / 05/21/2011 at 11:31am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, while trying to sneak out of my house to go to a party I met my mom trying to sneak back in. FML

Today, I was out shopping. It was fine until my dental crossbow broke as I was laughing. The springs locked, and I couldn't close my mouth. The orthodontist couldn't see me for two hours, leaving me to walk around town with my mouth hanging open like a psychopath. FML

by rockyrocket / 04/26/2011 at 3:19pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

by Mike / 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm / Health

Today, I witnessed two women in a catfight, ripping clothes off each other. This would have been great if the two women weren't my mom and my grandma. FML

by Danny / 04/25/2011 at 9:07am / Miscellaneous

Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML

by CheeseyPotatoes / 04/11/2011 at 9:16am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was reading a blog post by a girl that I really like. In the post, it said, "I know I'm not beautiful." I told her that I thought it wasn't true at all. She responded by crying hysterically and asking me why I would say that. It turned out that it actually said, "I know I'm beautiful." FML

by Arran / 04/09/2011 at 8:24pm / United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent) / Love

Today, I was reading my boyfriend's online diary. It started off really sweet, saying he was in a wonderful relationship with me, and how he utterly adored me. It then slowly progressed into loathing and wondering what he ever saw in me, all because I have a low sex-drive. FML

by worthless / 04/02/2011 at 8:51pm / United States / Love

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, my boyfriend called me and dumped me. Thirty minutes later he called asking for me back. When I asked why, he said "The other girl dumped me." FML

by life_isnt_fair / 03/09/2011 at 3:27am / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, my girlfriend's best friend told me she was in hospital after having made a suicide attempt. In shock, I had a panic attack and ended up in the hospital myself. Turns out it was all a lie to see whether or not I was committed to the relationship. FML

by FFFFF- / 03/02/2011 at 12:12pm / Singapore / Love

Today, while at a work meeting, I finally summoned up the courage to share and express my opinions about unprofessionalism in the office. After the meeting, I went to clean up, only to notice in the bathroom mirror that I'd had a booger pasted across my forehead throughout the meeting. FML

by Eric Forrest / 02/24/2011 at 3:27am / United States (Utah) / Work

Today, I made the discovery that I'm in a true love triangle; both of my girlfriends are dating one another. FML

by Anonymous / 02/12/2011 at 11:52am / United States (California) / Love