Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

birthdaybitch123

Search for a member

birthdaybitch123

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 May 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 539
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About birthdaybitch123 : i like pretty much all types of music, and imm the bday bitch!!! lol luv yaa

birthdaybitch123's page activity

Visits<b>ily1210</b> - the 03/05/2011 at 11:45pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 02/26/2011 at 12:04am<b>GreeenEggsAndHam</b> - the 12/30/2010 at 4:34am<b>Energokinetic</b> - the 07/06/2010 at 3:59am<b>LilAfo</b> - the 05/20/2010 at 4:00am<b>nicolejim95</b> - the 05/18/2010 at 8:08am<b>Eyeliner</b> - the 05/17/2010 at 9:02pm<b>cOnVeRsE94</b> - the 05/17/2010 at 2:18pm<b>emzilly1</b> - the 05/16/2010 at 7:36pm<b>krystina162010</b> - the 05/15/2010 at 5:42pm<b>lxclark</b> - the 05/15/2010 at 5:23am<b>Miss_lunatic</b> - the 04/30/2010 at 2:34am<b>Yuppie</b> - the 04/29/2010 at 5:41am<b>dessaye</b> - the 04/29/2010 at 4:59am<b>sweet_thangVA</b> - the 04/20/2010 at 2:33pm

birthdaybitch123's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

birthdaybitch123's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend asked for a picture of my penis, so I sent her one. Then later on, she asked for one when I was hard, the first one I sent I was hard. FML

#12595665
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31663) - you deserved it (16349)

On 08/18/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Photagrapher - Sent from mobile version

Today, it's the third day since my mum quit smoking, and I realised that her health-drive is having a negative effect on my own health when she bitch slapped me down the stairs because she didn't get a joke I told her. FML

#12449255
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31357) - you deserved it (3720)

On 08/11/2010 at 5:19am - health - by Thepunchline (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He is the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

#12438405
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30421) - you deserved it (8145)

On 08/10/2010 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by verno02 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML

#12408550
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40734) - you deserved it (13282)

On 08/09/2010 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Mikey832 (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

#8938821
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21054) - you deserved it (20223)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got a 95 on my term project. To congratulate me, my boyfriend said we're having sex tonight. I only get laid if I get good grades. FML

#8821519
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23958) - you deserved it (5820)

On 03/04/2010 at 10:48am - intimacy - by lalararara - United States

Today, I managed to fall face-first into a used condom. FML

#8801488
219 comments

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
451 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7215) - you deserved it (53456)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML

#8246402
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18159) - you deserved it (3178)

On 02/14/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by DallasGal (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

#5974378
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33026) - you deserved it (8723)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by sad_dad (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
925 comments

I agree, your life sucks (348227) - you deserved it (38602)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: