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beeship321's FML badges
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beeship321's favorite FMLs
Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML
by Anonymous / 11/09/2010 at 1:32pm / United States (New York) / Health
by kitty / 10/17/2010 at 10:54pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, it was the first day of astronomy class and we all waited for the professor to enter the classroom. All of a sudden, someone turns the lights off, it's pitch black, and we hear the professor saying, "Greetings earthlings..." It's going to be a long semester. FML
by Anonymous / 09/16/2010 at 2:04am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Richmond24 / 07/29/2010 at 3:10pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, a friend of mine came to my house with tears in her eyes. I thought she was finally single so I could ask her out. Actually, her mother found out she was dating a girl, so she wants me to be her fake boyfriend as a cover-up. At least we're "dating" now. FML
by Anonymous / 07/29/2010 at 2:24pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, my mother continued her lifelong habit of talking to anyone who isn't white in extremely slow, exaggerated "caveman" English. She insists that she isn't being racist, but rather is helping. FML
by notmuchfun / 07/20/2010 at 5:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/06/2010 at 7:32pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…