beautiful_hope

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Offline (the 09/25/2014 at 12:21am)

beautiful_hope

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3191
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About beautiful_hope : I cuss... A lot. My favorite word is fuck. I'm happily married. I'm a bitch. I'm cynical. I have zero faith in humanity as a whole & I think that we are in the beginning stages of Idiocracy. Animals are better than people. I'm brutally honest & it's not something I'm going to change. I stand up for what I believe is right. Your opinion of me doesn't matter & your argument is invalid. Don't like me? Fuck off. :)

beautiful_hope's page activity

Visits<b>legoman213579</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 8:25pm<b>max367</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 6:19pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 5:59pm<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 12:07pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 9:03am<b>10220706</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 11:37am<b>itsFishleyy</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 3:10am<b>Oihana</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 3:22pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 12:35am<b>samsessions99</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 9:06pm<b>BlankSteve</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 6:56pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 10:24pm<b>joeythesheaff</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 11:31pm<b>thhu_an</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:26pm<b>thischick113</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 2:09am<b>moosetracks22</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 8:59am<b>ashleylove0525</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:11pm<b>meb123hazel</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 8:54pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 11:58pm

beautiful_hope's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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beautiful_hope's favorite FMLs

Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2013 at 2:56am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found tiny little maggots in the bristles of my toothbrush. I have no idea how long they've been there. FML

by wombats / 09/28/2013 at 10:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

by SerenityJ / 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I was in love with his best friend. He confessed that he was too. FML

by me / 08/21/2013 at 7:45pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Love

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

by aly55a_mariie / 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML

by Love stinks / 08/19/2013 at 9:06am / United States / Love

Today, my sister had an emotional breakdown because two guys love her and she can't pick just one. Meanwhile I'm single and spend my time laying treats on my floor in a pattern and watching my rabbit run in circles. FML

by Having a pretty sister sucks. / 08/18/2013 at 9:36pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I got sent home early because a large fire broke out at work. I was greeted by the sight of my cocktard of a "boyfriend" making out on my sofa with another woman. He actually had the audacity and brass balls to claim he thought she was me. FML

by why yes, I do mean "ex-boyfriend" / 08/17/2013 at 6:40pm / Netherlands (Friesland) / Love

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

by fsfs / 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm / Germany (Schleswig-Holstein) / Miscellaneous

Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML

by NewBride / 08/14/2013 at 1:39pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing / 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 5:11am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, my 12-year-old son was shot in the foot. After hours of not talking, including to the police, he finally told us that his friend accidentally shot him with his dad's gun, and that he didn't want to say anything because he didn't want to "lose any street cred by snitching." FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 12:26am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my 26-year-old boyfriend came to my apartment to spend the night for the first time. He brought a "blankie" that he insisted was the only thing that could help him sleep. That "blankie" was his ex-girlfriend's silk nightgown. FML

by iwearsilkgownstoeatwaffles / 08/12/2013 at 10:30am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my fiancé asked for money to bail his brother out of jail, the same brother who happily spent a whole day recently trying to convince my fiancé that I've been cheating on him with my own cousin. So I said no. He shook his head in disgust and said that I'm "unbelievably spiteful". FML

by go choke on a gonad / 08/08/2013 at 9:13am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous