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bbhad96

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bbhad96

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Today, I was working as a host at a pasta dinner. The hostess I was working with was very attractive and we were flirting quite a bit. A large woman walked in to be seated, and I leaned over to her and dared her to ask the woman if she wanted two chairs. She leaned back and said "that's my mom". FML

#4224204
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10541) - you deserved it (67928)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:35am - work - by bigmouth (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was working as a host at a pasta dinner. The hostess I was working with was very attractive and we were flirting quite a bit. A large woman walked in to be seated, and I leaned over to her and dared her to ask the woman if she wanted two chairs. She leaned back and said "that's my mom". FML

#4224204
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10541) - you deserved it (67928)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:35am - work - by bigmouth (man) - United States (California)

Today, I planned a surprise birthday party for my boyfriend. I invited all his friend and made all his favorite food. He was running very late, so I called to ask what was taking so long. His response? He said he was at his house, with the very friends I was standing next to. FML

#4215163
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59395) - you deserved it (3554)

On 08/01/2009 at 9:29pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I finished doing a resume that I had spent three hours on. I e-mailed it to the business I was applying for, satisfied. I decided to look it over. The first thing I notice, I spelt my own name wrong. FML

#4208368
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9224) - you deserved it (49547)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:20pm - work - by anonymouschicka (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking in the mountains when I tripped, I grabbed onto the fence in an attempt to soften my fall. The fence was electric. FML

#4206061
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51762) - you deserved it (4142)

On 08/01/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by Electronotfriend (woman) - Poland (Pomorskie)

Today, my Dad sent me an e-mail wishing me a "Happy 21st Birthday, sweetheart!" The message went on and on about how much he loves and misses me and wishes we were closer, and can't believe how fast I'm growing up. I'm 23 and my birthday is in December. FML

#4203551
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48412) - you deserved it (2462)

On 08/01/2009 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out if you slide down the stairs on a foam matress topper, it just folds under instead of sliding. Then you slide the rest of the way down on your knees and break your nose at the bottom. FML

#4186568
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14108) - you deserved it (64185)

On 07/31/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by ohhmydamn (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my little 7 and 6 year old cousins came visit my family home. I heard the oldest one say that my sister was nice and pretty. Then the youngest replied "Yeah, but the older one has the face of a murderer." FML

#4175407
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41164) - you deserved it (3429)

On 07/31/2009 at 12:01am - kids - by BadMurderer (woman) - Mexico (Tabasco)

Today, I picked up my daughter from the day care but before we left, the babysitter needed to have a talk with me. To fill you in, I got a brand new prius yesterday. Apparently my daughter told eveyone that her mommy got a new penis. FML

#4157203
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39008) - you deserved it (3942)

On 07/30/2009 at 9:56am - kids - by Rae (woman) - United States - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, my mom asked me if I was crying because my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. That wasn't why I was crying. My mom knows things before I do. FML

#4147404
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49148) - you deserved it (2630)

On 07/29/2009 at 11:20pm - love - by screwed (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I just found out my dad got remarried a year ago. The woman is officially living with us, I got to have lunch with her alone today. I found out she is only 22, with a 14 year old little brother. My dad's 47. I'm 17, now with a 14 year old uncle and a mom that can pass for my girlfriend. FML

#4126370
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52922) - you deserved it (2647)

On 07/29/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by Beefballs (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was house sitting by myself and I texted my mom saying how thankful I was that she was trusting me and not checking up on me. That night I threw a party at the house. My mom showed up to check on me because my text was "suspicious". FML

#4105685
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7577) - you deserved it (112826)

On 07/28/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by idiot (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was house sitting by myself and I texted my mom saying how thankful I was that she was trusting me and not checking up on me. That night I threw a party at the house. My mom showed up to check on me because my text was "suspicious". FML

#4105685
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7577) - you deserved it (112826)

On 07/28/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by idiot (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was house sitting by myself and I texted my mom saying how thankful I was that she was trusting me and not checking up on me. That night I threw a party at the house. My mom showed up to check on me because my text was "suspicious". FML

#4105685
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7577) - you deserved it (112826)

On 07/28/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by idiot (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was house sitting by myself and I texted my mom saying how thankful I was that she was trusting me and not checking up on me. That night I threw a party at the house. My mom showed up to check on me because my text was "suspicious". FML

#4105685
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7577) - you deserved it (112826)

On 07/28/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by idiot (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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