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bartender

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 2737
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bartender's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 12:34am<b>lolthatonedude</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 12:18am<b>pearlgiggles</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 9:18am<b>kupokid94</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 2:49am<b>bubblz2</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 5:24pm<b>maddiiee00</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 5:51pm<b>randomblob</b> - the 09/09/2009 at 11:10pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/08/2009 at 11:05pm<b>leero</b> - the 06/22/2009 at 7:46pm<b>roflstephh</b> - the 06/22/2009 at 7:12pm

bartender's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

bartender's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that on Wednesday, when I have 2 exams, I'm called to testify in court. If I go to court, I cannot make the exams. If I take the exams, I'll be held in contempt and arrested. FML

#5182351
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40834) - you deserved it (5336)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by livin (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML

#5173603
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12455) - you deserved it (69122)

On 09/10/2009 at 7:17pm - love - by itisthedude (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my daughter used the kids potty chair on her own for the first time. Bad: The bucket was not in it so poo hit the floor. Good: she tried to clean it... Bad: with her socks. Good: she decided to clean the socks. Bad: she used the wall. Good: she finally called dad. FML

#5164209
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44605) - you deserved it (4222)

On 09/10/2009 at 3:51am - kids - by Udxero (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my co-worker came back from Thailand with big new breasts. She told me to go ahead and touch them because they have a funny texture for the first few months. When our GM entered the room, I had both hands down my co-worker's shirt, agreeing that they were unnaturally firm. FML

#5163835
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12975) - you deserved it (35063)

On 09/10/2009 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was sitting on a park bench with my very elderly grandfather while listening to music at a low volume. Suddenly, he turned to me and said very loudly, "I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD AIDS!" I received strange looks from everyone because he mistook my ear buds for a hearing aid. FML

#5150638
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37002) - you deserved it (4039)

On 09/09/2009 at 4:16pm - health - by Missy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was working at a hospital-level rest home. I was making the rounds when I noticed a woman was sitting in her (electric) wheelchair in the middle of the hall. Going closer I saw her battery was flat so I said "Uh-oh! Looks like you've died." She bawled her eyes out and said "Not yet." FML

#5144800
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13318) - you deserved it (48655)

On 09/09/2009 at 5:58am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, in Chem, I was chosen to hold the fire extinguisher just in case something happened while showing how to blow up a dangerous chemical. My teacher told me to spray if anything got out of control. He lit the fire and I freaked out and sprayed it. The entire wing of my school was evacuted. FML

#5131890
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8852) - you deserved it (40046)

On 09/08/2009 at 6:10pm - misc - by firefighter (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my renewed driver's license. It clearly indicates 'Sex: F'. My beard and penis beg to differ. FML

#5081396
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44918) - you deserved it (3495)

On 09/06/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by HeShe (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was at my boyfriends house, meeting his family for the first time. We were all standing in the kitchen when suddenly a small white and brown mouse ran by. As a natural instinct, I stomped on it. Turns out, it was his little sister's pet mouse that had gotten out of its cage earlier. FML

#5068921
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16784) - you deserved it (45979)

On 09/05/2009 at 9:31pm - misc - by JustMyLuck (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70191) - you deserved it (2900)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at a party when I got covered in the liquid from a glow stick. Thinking it wasn't a big deal I went to rub it off, but it stuck to my clothes. The cops came so everyone ran and hid in the bushes because we were all drunk. The cops arrested fifteen people because I glowed. FML

#5063911
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14577) - you deserved it (41608)

On 09/05/2009 at 4:54pm - misc - by Idiots (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my 26th birthday party got busted by my parents due to them coming home early because of a flight cancellation. Everyone had to leave, but not before my mother made me go to my room. FML

#5055356
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21758) - you deserved it (43949)

On 09/05/2009 at 3:07am - misc - by joeshmoe (man) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML

#5050946
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14814) - you deserved it (44443)

On 09/04/2009 at 11:07pm - misc - by flexibleflatulance (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went para sailing for the first time ever. My friends thought it would be funny to pull down my trunks right before my feet left the boat. I dangled there in the air for the whole resort to see. And I lost my shorts in the ocean. FML

#5039169
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39812) - you deserved it (2948)

On 09/04/2009 at 10:50am - misc - by no_hullabalo (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-wan)

Today, I had been working at the checkout for over 5 hours. Slighty tired while serving a customer, my eye accidentally twitched and I gave him a wink, he smiled and winked back. When I finished work 2 hours later he was outside, waiting for me, and followed me to my car, still smiling. FML

#5017787
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46637) - you deserved it (3638)

On 09/03/2009 at 9:27am - work - by Pop_Pies (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)



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