About bahamut_pure : Sarcasm is my native language.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Today, I found out my wife has been bribing my daughter to keep quiet about her affair with my boss. That would explain the iPhone 4S, the $500 shoes, the $200 purse, and the professional $300 haircut. They told me it was because she had straight A's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37196) - you deserved it (2484)
On 11/20/2011 at 9:05pm - kids - by brokeandalone (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, the first snow of the season fell. My husband celebrated by pelting me with snowballs, while I was on the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24556) - you deserved it (4525)
On 11/19/2011 at 2:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I gave my boyfriend the silent treatment. He put his Facebook status as "When your girlfriend finally shuts up for once". FML
I agree, your life sucks (12797) - you deserved it (30230)
On 11/19/2011 at 6:42am - love - by kaybax - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)
Today, my boss phoned me and asked me why I wasn't at work. I was in the staff room. I said hello to her as I came in the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22971) - you deserved it (1635)
On 11/19/2011 at 3:40am - work - by arthur (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, MS Word kept crashing with a memory error, so I called tech support. Instead of actually fixing the problem, their tech wasted over an hour of my time defragmenting the hard drive, disabling the anti-virus, and downloading new video card drivers from some shady site, before giving up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17224) - you deserved it (2073)
On 11/18/2011 at 7:48pm - work - by I quit (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading". FML
I agree, your life sucks (32383) - you deserved it (4357)
On 11/18/2011 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I got a letter of complaint from my landlord. It said my loud, obnoxious trampling is disturbing my downstairs neighbor, and I have to stop. I'm small and hardly weigh anything, but it seems that if I want to keep my lease, I'll have to master the art of levitating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20760) - you deserved it (2038)
On 11/18/2011 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I received a fine for leaving my car at the airport. Each day it's been there, they added an additional $50. My car was stolen two weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23879) - you deserved it (1490)
On 11/18/2011 at 2:24pm - misc - by Hunterisawesome - Reserved
Today, while working the drive-through at Mcdonald's, I was handing a gentleman his vanilla shake. He responded by popping the cap off, yelling "Fire in the hole!" And throwing it back in. He then quickly drove off. I was covered in vanilla shake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29100) - you deserved it (3680)
On 11/18/2011 at 7:22am - work - by Anothernametaken (man) - United States
Today, my mother, her fiancé, and I were having dinner together. My mother was joking that she wasn't sure she could hold him down, as he used to "get around." She turned to talk to the waiter and my future step-father looked me up and down and winked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26644) - you deserved it (1531)
On 11/18/2011 at 6:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my boyfriend went and bought Skyrim, Modern Warfare 3 and renewed his WoW subscription. Looks like I won't be getting laid for a month or two. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37062) - you deserved it (8625)
On 11/17/2011 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I realized that in my relationship with my significant other, the roles are switched. We went out for a nice dinner, I paid, and when we got home he "had a headache" and asked for an aspirin so he could go to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19592) - you deserved it (4672)
On 11/17/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by Damnit (woman) - United States (California)
Today, just like every other day, I was woken up 2 hours earlier than I needed to be, by the alarm belonging to my upstairs neighbors. They won't wake up until their real alarm goes off: me, pounding the walls and yelling in frustration. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18437) - you deserved it (1330)
On 11/17/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by tnh - United States
Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26159) - you deserved it (3451)
On 11/17/2011 at 11:50am - work - by Chubby - United States
Today, my elderly neighbor used his snowblower to send all of the fallen leaves in his yard into mine, which I'd raked earlier that morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16904) - you deserved it (1403)
On 11/17/2011 at 7:43am - misc - by leaf hater - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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