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Today, I yet again heard a friend say "YOLO" as if it's a word. It was so annoying that I had to restrain myself from punching him in the face and offering him the chance to suck on one of my turds, since apparently "YOLO." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13436) - you deserved it (3345)
On 04/24/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I came home from work to find my kids playing Frisbee with my collection of rare, valuable vinyl records. The term "smash hit record" took on a whole new meaning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18334) - you deserved it (1624)
On 04/18/2012 at 2:57am - kids - by ChampionshipVinyl - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15158) - you deserved it (14383)
Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24467) - you deserved it (1904)
On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9703) - you deserved it (39869) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France
Today, a guy asked me why I'm single. As a joke, I told him that not only do I have a penis, but that it's so large that most men are intimidated by it. He wasn't impressed. And I actually wonder why I'm single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7339) - you deserved it (17602)
On 04/13/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I told my girlfriend that I would still care for her if she was a vegetable. She informed me that if I was a potato, she would cut me into chips. And fry me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15453) - you deserved it (5658)
Today, I got home to find our house broken into. Among other things, the thieves took our television, my laptop and several pieces of expensive jewelry. Also missing was my daughter's My Little Pony collection. I think we were robbed by a Brony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17657) - you deserved it (1204)
On 04/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it was the only time in my life that I have ever received an A+ for something. Thank you, eBay buyer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8821) - you deserved it (10773)
On 04/10/2012 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, my daughter sat me down for a long talk. It turns out that she thinks she is the Chosen One. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19130) - you deserved it (2291)
On 04/10/2012 at 10:13am - kids - by kayadd33 - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15020) - you deserved it (1705)
On 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm - animals - by Lee (woman) - United States
Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28032) - you deserved it (2263)
On 04/09/2012 at 1:15am - money - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I realized I'm too short to use the urinals at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21161) - you deserved it (1800)
On 04/06/2012 at 7:32am - work - by littleman (man) - United States
Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23594) - you deserved it (1315)
On 04/03/2012 at 11:40pm - misc - by Eliza - United States (Texas)
Today, while at work, I found a dead dog in a freezer. Turns out it's been in there for over 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19673) - you deserved it (1295)
On 04/03/2012 at 11:27pm - animals - by Scarred (man) - United States (Michigan)
Monday 20 May 2013
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