About baby4mommy : My name is Jamie. My cat Sparkle and I share an apartment just across the river from NYC. In college I studied fine art with an emphasis on oil painting, illustration and a minor in art history. I had a successful career and business until a visit to the ER left me in a coma for 21 weeks. I woke up paralyzed ... unable to even turn my head. After a lengthy recovery at St. Charles and Kessler Institutes I learned how to breathe again without a machine. I also recovered some feeling (about 35%) from above the elbows and upwards. With no feeling below the elbows I am still technically a quadriplegic or partial quad so resuming my art career is still off the table for now. I am highly optimistic about employment as a human doorstop or paperweight.
baby4mommy's FML badges
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
baby4mommy's favorite FMLs
Today, I was really happy because the guy I've been on a few dates with wanted to take pictures with me. I thought it'd meant that he really liked me, but it turns out he just wanted them so he could post them online and make his ex-girlfriend jealous. FML
by ReboundGrl / 05/23/2016 at 2:44pm / United States (Nevada) / Love
Today, the checkout guy at my local store asked me if I had my hair cut. I answered and started talking about my hair, and he gave me a really weird look. He was talking to his friend, who I hadn't noticed in the queue behind me. FML
by figcurzyez / 05/23/2016 at 11:57am / United Kingdom (Essex) / Miscellaneous
Today, while in class, my friend would not stop annoying me by tapping me on the shoulder every so often. After the fifth time, I lost my patience, told him to F off, and slapped his hand. Only it wasn't my friend tapping my shoulder this time, it was my teacher. FML
by gettinganF / 05/23/2016 at 7:57am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by Anon / 05/23/2016 at 6:49am / United States (Illinois) / Kids
Today, I was the only driver at the pizza place I work at, since it was the morning shift. My recently made ex-boyfriend ordered pizza for delivery. Guess who got to take it to him. And guess who got a 34 cent tip. FML
by MagickAngel / 05/23/2016 at 3:19am / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, we took an AP exam for Literature. One of the passages was about keeping in feelings in a relationship so that no one is "a burden". My boyfriend read the same passage and felt like he was a burden. I can't convince him otherwise. Thank you college board for endangering my relationship. FML
by welp / 05/22/2016 at 4:22pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
by Llamadroid / 05/22/2016 at 2:19pm / United States (California) / Geek
by Seriouslynow / 05/22/2016 at 1:55pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, as I was instructing our new third grade students about how our martial arts classes are safer than people think, someone broke their leg right in front of their innocent faces. They saw the bone sticking out. FML
by muaythaiboss / 05/22/2016 at 1:45pm / United States (Virginia) / Work
by seththing / 05/21/2016 at 11:49pm / Transportation
by really / 05/21/2016 at 10:23pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
by hrs220 / 05/21/2016 at 5:55pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Kaibel / 05/21/2016 at 5:39pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, after I skipped dessert for the third day in a row, my mom cornered me and accused me of being anorexic. I'm actually not far off being clinically obese and I'm just trying to diet, but nothing I say will convince her. She wants me to see a psychiatrist about a disorder I don't even have. FML
by chronic masticator / 05/21/2016 at 7:51am / United States / Health
Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on the job. After his mom finally got home 4 hours later, he called her a slut. When he got in trouble for it, he claimed that I taught him the word. Needless to say, I didn't get paid. FML
by Anonymous / 05/21/2016 at 12:27am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids