About baby4mommy : My name is Jamie. My cat Sparkle and I share an apartment just across the river from NYC. In college I studied fine art with an emphasis on oil painting, illustration and a minor in art history. I had a successful career and business until a visit to the ER left me in a coma for 21 weeks. I woke up paralyzed ... unable to even turn my head. After a lengthy recovery at St. Charles and Kessler Institutes I learned how to breathe again without a machine. I also recovered some feeling (about 35%) from above the elbows and upwards. With no feeling below the elbows I am still technically a quadriplegic or partial quad so resuming my art career is still off the table for now. I am highly optimistic about employment as a human doorstop or paperweight.
baby4mommy's FML badges
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
baby4mommy's favorite FMLs
Today, I found out my brand new $3,000 mattress that is supposed to relieve my back pain works amazingly. I only discovered this because my wife, son, daughter, dog, and two cats are all asleep on it and not waking up. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2016 at 1:53am / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I placed sticky mouse traps in my bedroom. it's now 12:05 a.m. and I've successfully caught a mouse. Too bad I'm scared of them and my husband is passed out asleep. I now get to listen to a mouse squeak all night and have to be up in 4 hours. FML.
by MouseLover.. / 09/30/2016 at 12:06am / United States / Animals
Today, I found out my father has been saving money to help me buy my first car. In the same conversation, I found out my mother, unbeknownst to my dad, used nearly all of the money to bail my drunken, deadbeat uncle out of jail for the 4th time a month ago. He is now back in prison. FML
by fox_at_heart / 09/29/2016 at 10:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
by Lamediseased / 09/29/2016 at 11:07am / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Health
by mavrick127 / 09/29/2016 at 10:21am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, I secured a tender for my boss, earning her 1/4 million in profits. Today is also meant to be pay-day for us, but my boss is too busy dealing with the tender to pay her employees. So essentially, I made my boss rich while remaining broke and in debt. FML
by SoDamnBroke / 09/28/2016 at 9:13am / South Africa / Money
Today, my boyfriend and I wanted to kayak. On the way, I told him I had to go back to our hotel because I needed the bathroom and didn't want a public one to smell. Once back in the elevator at the hotel, it got stuck. For an hour. I pooped myself and had to wait 40 minutes after that for help. FML
by ItWasOurAnniversary / 09/28/2016 at 8:08am / Australia / Health
Today, it's my last day at my job because I'm moving to another city. My boss handed me a card and chocolates. The same boss that didn't sign the card because, "Even though you're a great employee, I probably won't remember your name in a fortnight." I've been there three years. FML
by Bawsack / 09/26/2016 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of) / Work
by Fat and Embarrassed / 09/25/2016 at 10:09pm / United States (California) / Work
by anonymous / 09/24/2016 at 9:10am / United States (Washington) / Work
by b.fritz / 09/24/2016 at 6:02am / United States (Missouri) / Love
by NoJob / 09/24/2016 at 2:41am / United Kingdom (Redcar and Cleveland) / Work
by spaceavery / 09/24/2016 at 12:53am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, I bought a friendship bracelet. I'm not sure what's sadder, the fact that I don't actually have a friend to give the other half to, or that I'm actually wearing one of them so it looks like I have friends. FML
by very very lonely / 09/24/2016 at 12:18am / Miscellaneous
by stoolgal / 09/23/2016 at 2:19am / United States (Oklahoma) / Health