Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bReLiNg

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

bReLiNg

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1215
  • Number of comments : 195
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 31 posted

About bReLiNg : I'm just a leftie trying to understand this right world....

bReLiNg's page activity

Visits<b>horsehaed7</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 4:14am<b>homiwan</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 6:57am<b>killa4eva</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:15am<b>Megan_xox</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 6:39pm<b>AkaMido</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 11:47pm<b>Peck_Kcep</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 4:51pm<b>hawaiiankitty</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:52pm<b>kota2165</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 8:35pm<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 5:51pm<b>kangx1</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:53pm<b>airborneranger7</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 8:09am<b>smilie97</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 11:39pm<b>dr_hotwings</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 2:23am<b>djoudjou7598</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 8:51am<b>Mangoesweg</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 12:25pm<b>lorellecaimyth</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 12:30am<b>Reaaal04</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 2:33am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 9:46pm

bReLiNg's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of bReLiNg's badges

bReLiNg's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up from a horrible nightmare. What was it about? Me accidentally scratching a non-stick pan with my utility knife. FML

Today, my boyfriend complained all day about being bored, so wanting to cheer him up, I put on some sexy clothes and went to his house. I got on his bed in my underwear and called him over. He quickly decided he'd rather play Diablo for the next five hours instead. FML

#21162704
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51726) - you deserved it (7514)

On 06/04/2014 at 11:52am - intimacy - by Justawoman (woman) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47426) - you deserved it (7217)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML

#21080535
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40550) - you deserved it (3236)

On 03/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Jehovah God (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML

#21050725
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35880) - you deserved it (40336)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:48pm - health - by anonymous - United States

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56350) - you deserved it (6675)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

#20773275
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27367) - you deserved it (45833)

On 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by John - United States

Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML

#20770214
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43640) - you deserved it (4151)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:19am - animals - by PerfectTiming - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I was feeding some ducks. One of them choked to death on the old bread. FML

#20744476
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47607) - you deserved it (13581)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - Belgium

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

#20726673
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47853) - you deserved it (20218)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by Jill (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I have an upset stomach. Every other minute, it sounds like Chewbacca is screaming to get out. FML

#20675696
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35229) - you deserved it (4439)

On 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm - health - by pixkalexi - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML

#20669324
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41750) - you deserved it (14357)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77183) - you deserved it (5275)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60451) - you deserved it (9135)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: