Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

awkward_gothlady

Search for a member

awkward_gothlady
  • Town/Country : Quito, Ecuador
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 November 1982 (31 years)
  • Number of visits : 783
  • Number of comments : 328
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About awkward_gothlady : Creative. Eccentric. Shy. Fun. Cat person. Crazy.

awkward_gothlady's last visitors

more4mezBLAKEzredwill85cwl727TheGreatLMornaiDo_Not_DisplayHiimhaileypotter

awkward_gothlady's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of awkward_gothlady's badges

awkward_gothlady's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the "vines" I was cutting down this morning were actually poison oak. I can only see out of one eye, and I'm virtually unrecognizable due to the facial swelling. FML

#20052545
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14997) - you deserved it (2436)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:37pm - health - by merissa22 - United States (Illinois)

Today, the girl I went on an awkward date with two weeks ago showed up at university and started smashing my car with a bat. She then broke down in tears and alternated between declaring her love, and cussing me out for "cheating" on her. FML

#20051466
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24196) - you deserved it (1982)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:49pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to try to serenade me by throwing rocks at my window and singing a song about how much he loves me. This would have been extremely sweet if he would have gotten my window instead of my dad's. FML

#20050638
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17516) - you deserved it (1655)

On 08/31/2012 at 6:16am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got rear-ended. An old woman got out and came over to my car window. I thought she was coming to apologize and trade insurance companies. Instead, she poured her soda on my head, ran back into her car, and drove away. FML

#20050170
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19643) - you deserved it (1227)

On 08/30/2012 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got rear-ended. An old woman got out and came over to my car window. I thought she was coming to apologize and trade insurance companies. Instead, she poured her soda on my head, ran back into her car, and drove away. FML

#20050170
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19643) - you deserved it (1227)

On 08/30/2012 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had a planned 12-hour power cut for maintenance work, which I'd forgot all about. In need of a shower before work, I spent 45 minutes boiling pots of water on the stove to take a lukewarm, 6-inch deep bath, before realizing my water heater runs on natural gas and was working fine. FML

#20048975
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6637) - you deserved it (22927)

On 08/30/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by Powerless (man) - Australia

Today, my car was towed for the second time in front of my own house. They tried to tell me it was because they didn't think I lived there anymore. The person who had it towed had just spoken to me not three hours before. FML

#20047754
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19373) - you deserved it (1165)

On 08/29/2012 at 11:01am - money - by drixxy - United States (California)

Today, I had a piano exam. My friend noticed how nervous I was, and recommended that I compliment the examiner for higher marks. When it was time for the exam, without thinking, I told him I liked his hair. Turns out bald people don't like that. FML

#20046479
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5347) - you deserved it (19551)

On 08/28/2012 at 4:38pm - misc - by p (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned that several thousand people in my state got tickets this month for driving and talking on the phone. My mom called to tell me this while I was driving. I'm now part of that statistic. Thanks, mom. FML

#20046150
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7715) - you deserved it (27763)

On 08/28/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by ticketed - United States (New York)

Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I had forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML

#20044345
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6225) - you deserved it (29144)

On 08/27/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by dgilbs - United States (Michigan)

Today, I started my new job at a fragrance store. While training, the manager had me smell all of the scents to become familiar with the products. Before my shift was over, I'd had three asthma attacks. FML

#20044273
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18372) - you deserved it (4695)

On 08/27/2012 at 9:33am - work - by Joe - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I started my new job at a fragrance store. While training, the manager had me smell all of the scents to become familiar with the products. Before my shift was over, I'd had three asthma attacks. FML

#20044273
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18372) - you deserved it (4695)

On 08/27/2012 at 9:33am - work - by Joe - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I started my new job at a fragrance store. While training, the manager had me smell all of the scents to become familiar with the products. Before my shift was over, I'd had three asthma attacks. FML

#20044273
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18372) - you deserved it (4695)

On 08/27/2012 at 9:33am - work - by Joe - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got a flat tire. The spare was also flat, so I had no other choice but to walk home. I got to my house and realized I'd left the front door key and garage clicker in my car 5 miles away. FML

#20044019
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16667) - you deserved it (8182)

On 08/27/2012 at 3:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML

#20043181
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20708) - you deserved it (2516)

On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: