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asti89

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asti89

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 January 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1484
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About asti89 : My name is Astrid.
I live out the country.
And I'm obsessed with Turtles

asti89's page activity

Visits<b>derekmalc</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 2:22pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:04pm<b>ha</b> - the 01/02/2010 at 2:15pm<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 12/12/2009 at 2:25pm<b>Fentown</b> - the 11/20/2009 at 5:05pm<b>muffy_da_bear</b> - the 09/22/2009 at 8:09pm<b>Daaniellee1234</b> - the 08/27/2009 at 7:55pm<b>Drakon</b> - the 07/24/2009 at 7:36am<b>PinkWashed</b> - the 07/18/2009 at 4:29pm<b>Yulia</b> - the 07/10/2009 at 3:25am<b>exkayseedee</b> - the 07/07/2009 at 1:36am<b>justmy_luck</b> - the 07/06/2009 at 12:52pm<b>katelynmarie</b> - the 06/30/2009 at 1:10pm<b>SusanaSaysRawrxD</b> - the 06/30/2009 at 1:47am<b>roundnproud</b> - the 06/29/2009 at 2:55pm<b>HaleyRAWRa7x</b> - the 06/29/2009 at 1:10pm<b>What_fut_YADY</b> - the 06/29/2009 at 5:47am<b>Jaynayg</b> - the 06/27/2009 at 4:44am

asti89's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

asti89's favorite FMLs

Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML

#2881104
367 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29655) - you deserved it (53426)

On 06/14/2009 at 8:46am - misc - by locksmack (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I woke up from a dream about finding a vending machine that gave me free food. I kept eating, it was so satisfying words could not describe how great it felt. Then I realized my hands were in between my legs, I had been touching myself dreaming about free food from a vending machine. FML

#2801625
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66556) - you deserved it (14803)

On 06/11/2009 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by hdat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I bought my cat a nice big bag of expensive anti-hairball catfood, so she'd stop puking hairballs on my things. After eating it, she started running around wildly, howling and projectile vomiting on EVERYTHING. FML

#2655825
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44652) - you deserved it (6397)

On 06/06/2009 at 9:17am - animals - by Jay (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was taking a bath and out of boredom started making sheep noises. I then had a conversation with myself in farm animal noises. When I got out of the bath, I walked to my bedroom in my towel, passing the living room... where my little brother's soccer team burst out laughing. FML

#2637147
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21245) - you deserved it (69395)

On 06/05/2009 at 5:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

#2459150
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22726) - you deserved it (75488)

On 05/31/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by deucelututi - United States (New York)

Today, I had a dentist appointment. While waiting, I pulled out my Cosmo magazine to entertain myself. The woman sitting across from me points and tells me I'm reading "Satan's Manual." I told her I don't believe in Satan. She said, "You'll know he's real when you become his bitch!" FML

#2442070
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50610) - you deserved it (7555)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:22pm - misc - by satanlovesme (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

#1930454
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17004) - you deserved it (94820)

On 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was eating at a restaurant patio with a few friends. After the waitress cleaned up our table there was a drop of mayonnaise on the table. I wiped it with my finger and licked it. It wasn’t mayo, it was bird shit. FML

#1712833
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32348) - you deserved it (138940)

On 05/07/2009 at 7:36am - animals - by MJ3105 (man) - Israel

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (178288) - you deserved it (45713)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, While I was running around the block I had this urge to spit. Suddenly I noticed this beautiful girl running in front me. Trying to impress her, I smiled and by mistake drooled everything on the pavement. She wasn't impressed. FML

#1299793
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13311) - you deserved it (43772)

On 04/24/2009 at 8:13pm - misc - by djteller (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I got pulled over while dancing to crazy techno beats in the car. The officer RAN out of his car and up to mine and pounded on my window. He thought I was having a seizure. FML

#1292437
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44758) - you deserved it (19635)

On 04/24/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by bdutton (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML

#1177912
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51151) - you deserved it (23956)

On 04/20/2009 at 11:11pm - animals - by whymommywhy (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was playing and laughing with my new baby boy. He was giggling, and it was adorable. Out of nowhere I say "you're my favorite!". Now I'm sitting here talking to my two other children about how what I said earlier I didn't mean personally. They never want to talk to me again. FML

#1176288
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15674) - you deserved it (117120)

On 04/20/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by Damnlife123 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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