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ashleeyka's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
ashleeyka's favorite FMLs
by Lauren Smith / 10/17/2010 at 12:52pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, my car door and window were broken when a thief broke into my car. Cost to repair the damage? $600. Increase to my car insurance premiums? $40 a month. What'd they steal from my car? A $0.98 chocolate chip cookie. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 5:54pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation
Today, I was walking to school. I started running to catch up with my friend. I yelled her name, and she turned around in time to watch me slip on a sheet of ice, fall face first, and pass out. When she ran to my side, I unconsciously peed on her. FML
by anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 11:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by princessj / 10/16/2010 at 1:50am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
by A. / 10/14/2010 at 3:15am / United States / Transportation
by Anonymous / 10/13/2010 at 11:28am / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Money
by anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 11:06pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I lost the remote control to my TV. I can't change the channel manually on it, and the channel it's stuck on is currently playing an infomercial for the Pos-T-Vac penis pump. I've been watching this for an hour now. I'm a female, and I'm beginning to feel like I need this product. FML
by Anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 6:50am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 3:41am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in the elevator with my new boss. He asked things like "How are you?" "How's your day going?" and "What's for dinner?" I answered everything and tried to make small talk. I then noticed that he was wearing a bluetooth and was talking to someone else. FML
by Anonymous / 10/09/2010 at 5:41am / United States (California) / Work
Today, after weeks of thinking and playing every outcome possible in my head, I told my parents I'm gay. My dad nodded and didn't even look up from his book; my mom told me to go to the doctor if it starts to itch. FML
by Anonymous / 10/09/2010 at 2:47am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/08/2010 at 1:23am / United States / Health
by Vinny1017 / 10/07/2010 at 10:26am / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I'm on holiday in Vietnam, and was wearing a new shirt. In a restaurant, the waitress pointed at my shirt and said something I couldn't understand, so I just smiled and nodded my head. She then gave me a weird look and walked away. Turns out there was a huge spider on it. FML
by Anonymous / 10/06/2010 at 4:40am / Vietnam / Animals
Today, I was late to a sold out movie in the theater, so I had to shuffle in during the previews in the dark. I sat down in what I thought was the last vacant seat, but I'd really just sat in a small woman's lap. She was not happy. FML
by Anonymous / 09/13/2010 at 4:52pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…