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ashleeyka

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ashleeyka
  • Town/Country : San Antonio, US
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 October 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 2660
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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ashleeyka's last visitors

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ashleeyka's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of ashleeyka's badges

ashleeyka's favorite FMLs

Today, at 2 in the morning, my water broke. I called my mom and woke her up to come watch our older kid, while my husband and I went to the hospital. After being tested at the hospital, I was told I had just peed myself. FML

#16074801
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38788) - you deserved it (7828)

On 05/07/2011 at 1:58am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while being robbed, a man heroically chased down the robber and got my purse back. He then looked at the distance between us, turned the other way and ran off with it. FML

#15974140
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42483) - you deserved it (3197)

On 04/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18257) - you deserved it (28315)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

#15678976
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28706) - you deserved it (10136)

On 04/07/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

#15514877
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39779) - you deserved it (27803)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by rowie1311 (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I learned, 15 years later, that my puppy from when I was 4, was not taken by Santa because he was in need of a reindeer. My parents took him to the shelter because they thought he was ugly. FML

#15508713
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35865) - you deserved it (4568)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:10am - misc - by leeseyxoxo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML

#15493619
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29189) - you deserved it (15172)

On 03/26/2011 at 2:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

#15405912
494 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33481) - you deserved it (47499)

On 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm - kids - by failureparent (man) - United States (California)

Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML

#15385688
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34974) - you deserved it (6704)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Abby_gummibear (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35988) - you deserved it (22607)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML

#14789249
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33028) - you deserved it (4078)

On 01/31/2011 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by yournick (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25123) - you deserved it (6957) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I called the college of my dreams to check the status of my application. Turns out they "never received" copies of my transcripts. They did however cash the $70 application fee that was mailed with them. FML

#14653103
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25427) - you deserved it (1949)

On 01/20/2011 at 7:10pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML

#14594110
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32716) - you deserved it (3005)

On 01/15/2011 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to play a friendly game of Clue with my family. This resulted in one kid crying, one dad with a broken nose, two broken plates and a trip to Walmart to get a new Clue game. FML

#14593657
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20193) - you deserved it (3223)

On 01/15/2011 at 8:50pm - misc - by fail (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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