ashleeyka

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ashleeyka

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 October 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6099
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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ashleeyka's page activity

Visits<b>Fgjvshnb</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 4:42pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 11:48pm<b>briang959</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 5:40am<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 6:36pm<b>dalvin8</b> - the 04/22/2012 at 11:28pm<b>Blazar420</b> - the 10/26/2011 at 8:32am<b>kiakia0131</b> - the 10/25/2011 at 10:57am<b>CaptainPickles72</b> - the 10/24/2011 at 12:52pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:53pm<b>Soup</b> - the 03/15/2011 at 11:47am<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 3:25pm<b>meteor_stream</b> - the 11/02/2010 at 5:15pm

Fucked!<b>briang959</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:40am

ashleeyka's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of ashleeyka's badges

ashleeyka's favorite FMLs

Today, my elderly neighbor called the police because my cat was in her yard. I now have a citation and a court date. Apparently, there is a leash law for cats in my town, and it is taken very seriously. FML

by Fought The Law / 10/29/2011 at 12:51am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 11:52am / United States / Kids

Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML

by titoutou222 / 10/22/2011 at 8:40am / France / Kids

Today, it was our 5th anniversary, so I decided to play a little joke on my girlfriend. Before I gave her the real present, an engagement ring, I gave her a gift-wrapped rolling pin instead. I ended up in the hospital. FML

by Awie / 10/20/2011 at 4:26am / Austria (Wien) / Love

Today, I got a speeding ticket while taking my drivers license test. FML

by dust1535538 / 10/13/2011 at 12:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I pulled into the gas station to fill up only to realize I had forgot my wallet. By the time I went home, got it, and came back, the price had gone up eleven cents. FML

by WhoopteeDooDoo / 10/12/2011 at 6:47pm / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML

by kidswithnomanners / 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML

by heheheh / 08/22/2011 at 2:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my stepbrother found my diary and read it. He then told my boyfriend how I had a crush on another guy, and no longer liked him, causing my boyfriend to break up with me. That diary was from the third grade. FML

by Tinkerer / 08/21/2011 at 2:25am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML

by Emily / 08/21/2011 at 12:54am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I had a cop pull me over because he claimed that he saw me taking a bunch of colorful pills at the previous stop sign. I was eating skittles. FML

by candymansvan17 / 08/17/2011 at 5:50pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my parrot to oranges. Now she makes a high pitched scream if I don't give her any, and I've just run out of oranges. FML

by bursteardrums / 08/16/2011 at 11:00am / United Kingdom (Devon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

by soccerbuddyz / 08/03/2011 at 12:04am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous