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asdfghjkkl

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  • Number of visits : 1586
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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asdfghjkkl's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:23pm

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asdfghjkkl's favorite FMLs

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML

#5954141
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11593) - you deserved it (43914)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I learned that being a twin really isn't that cool. After laughing at my twin brother for getting a speeding ticket he turns to me and says "It's not mine." Confused, I look at the ticket and see my name. He used my license. FML

#5913755
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43270) - you deserved it (4015)

On 10/20/2009 at 3:03pm - misc - by Twinner (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML

#5813153
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31086) - you deserved it (2476)

On 10/13/2009 at 7:07am - love - by quietsleeper (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I received a call from a collection agency. Since I had no clue, I was ready to file a police report for stolen identity. I then called my mom only to find out she has been opening new credit cards with my information for 3 years and not paying them. My credit is ruined and I'm only 21. FML

#5802914
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39185) - you deserved it (1819)

On 10/12/2009 at 7:32pm - money - by thafinest (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my electricity went out. The electric company said it was because the bill was at least 4 months overdue. Apparently, I have been paying for my roommate to go out and party for weeks. FML

#5790955
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30684) - you deserved it (3465)

On 10/12/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was taking a bubble bath, and had my iPod touch on the side of my bathtub so I could listen to my music. My dog walked up to the side of the tub, looked me in the eye, and nudged my iPod into the water. FML

#5789992
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11986) - you deserved it (50050)

On 10/12/2009 at 1:36am - animals - by bubbles (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML

#5721676
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74716) - you deserved it (5482)

On 10/08/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while working on my girlfriend of three years' computer I found a file called 'My future wedding'. I assumed it was very old and decided to look through it. Of the list of 5 potential grooms I was not one of them. This didn't bother me until I saw that it had last been edited two days ago. FML

#5721325
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37578) - you deserved it (3892)

On 10/08/2009 at 1:31pm - love - by Rage (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad took a call while driving. He always yells and curses at people who talk on their cell while driving. I asked him to get off the phone because it's dangerous, and told him he's being a hypocrite. He shook his head at me and continued talking. Seconds later, we got into an accident. FML

#5719092
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36380) - you deserved it (3282)

On 10/08/2009 at 7:40am - misc - by Irony (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

#5708797
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30342) - you deserved it (15095)

On 10/07/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me because I'm in the military and I'm gone too much. The reason I enlisted in the first place is because we agreed that the money and benefits I would earn would help us be able to start a family in the future. FML

#5703521
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39238) - you deserved it (3413)

On 10/07/2009 at 2:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML

#5701860
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (162082) - you deserved it (8155)

On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML

#5677989
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9519) - you deserved it (32188)

On 10/06/2009 at 3:12am - misc - by limecat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to dress in all black with a ski mask and use my spare key to break into my house as a joke. He though it was even funnier when I jumped out the window and broke my leg. FML

#5622271
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37451) - you deserved it (5626)

On 10/03/2009 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

#5589145
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43983) - you deserved it (3284)

On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon



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