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ariverperson

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ariverperson

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2050
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About ariverperson : I like Red Hot Chili Peppers, Lord of the Rings and hash browns

ariverperson's page activity

Visits<b>juliapereth</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 11:12am<b>xMrsCarlilex</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 8:05pm<b>tehstarchild</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 6:01am<b>Superdouchebag</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 5:18pm<b>DaniloDanigga</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 10:37pm<b>Oihana</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 11:10am<b>masteraegis</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 11:29am<b>FC_trollmaster</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:12am<b>marleybree</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:04am<b>mandy1997</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 5:36pm<b>Zepherros</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 2:38am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 4:35pm<b>anywhereanytime</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 7:16pm<b>yomedudeo</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 2:48am<b>dafuck_15</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 11:03am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 1:53pm<b>awesomecrazyboy</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 11:56pm

ariverperson's FML badges

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Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of ariverperson's badges

ariverperson's favorite FMLs

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28455) - you deserved it (5995)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after I spent two hours trying to teach my girlfriend to play sudoku, she broke up with me, tearfully claiming that I'd made up a fake, imaginary game to make her feel stupid. FML

#20167793
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31084) - you deserved it (3182)

On 11/18/2012 at 7:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

#20165510
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34275) - you deserved it (3496)

On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

#20037909
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35733) - you deserved it (10421) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version

Today, I worked overtime with three guys who never shut up about partying and getting laid. When I finally escaped the testosterone and got home, the first thing I heard was my grandpa telling my dad all about how he once fisted a girl to orgasm. FML

#20023096
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32094) - you deserved it (2684)

On 08/15/2012 at 6:52pm - intimacy - by what the FUCK (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML

#19913255
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25950) - you deserved it (3552)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:31am - kids - by LNamesOnly (man) - Australia

Today, I was woken up by a noise coming from the bathroom. Upon investigation, I discovered my very drunk, giggling girlfriend attempting to urinate standing up. Carefully note the word "attempting". FML

#19756840
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22888) - you deserved it (1999)

On 06/08/2012 at 7:54pm - love - by SprinklerDodger (man) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML

#19255616
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30795) - you deserved it (2919)

On 03/11/2012 at 3:36am - love - by Tristan Brantley - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML

#18772275
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13569) - you deserved it (32023)

On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She got my cock out, stopped, and told me it looked like "Rufus the naked mole rat." She spent the next 20 minutes showing me pictures, describing in detail why they looked similar, and laughing. FML

#17889582
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33927) - you deserved it (4294)

On 10/02/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by rufusthepenis - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41499) - you deserved it (6217)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, while flicking my bean, I was thinking about my boyfriend who moved to California last week. Before I came, I had to stop because I started crying. FML

#17473520
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27873) - you deserved it (9050)

On 08/14/2011 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the park with my daughter. She walked up to a boy at the swings, held her hand out, and said, "Hi I'm Vanessa, and someday you'll be working for me." FML

#16591956
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31298) - you deserved it (12100)

On 06/10/2011 at 5:57am - kids - by Rachel (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML

#14295570
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35159) - you deserved it (8715)

On 12/22/2010 at 6:43am - kids - by lerouxmaster -



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