arieelxx

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arieelxx

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 938
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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arieelxx's page activity

Visits<b>DutchRogue</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 10:31am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 8:01am<b>Ollie85</b> - the 12/10/2010 at 4:49pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 09/26/2010 at 8:08pm<b>Ewokinator</b> - the 09/26/2010 at 3:10pm<b>vellexis</b> - the 09/15/2010 at 2:21pm<b>roundnproud</b> - the 09/13/2010 at 10:56pm<b>Zebidee</b> - the 09/13/2010 at 6:57pm<b>ispitflames</b> - the 09/11/2010 at 4:15am<b>uglypuppy246</b> - the 09/07/2010 at 8:21pm<b>rallets</b> - the 09/07/2010 at 6:57am<b>MoeF</b> - the 09/07/2010 at 6:33am<b>GlaoigharAirm</b> - the 09/07/2010 at 4:00am<b>lostfaithinpppl</b> - the 09/03/2010 at 10:05pm<b>I_hate_it_all</b> - the 08/28/2010 at 6:06am<b>cylebendewald</b> - the 08/26/2010 at 5:34pm

arieelxx's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

arieelxx's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML

by Andrew / 08/23/2011 at 10:46am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 1:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I walked into the laundry room when my mom pulled a condom wrapper out of my pants pocket. She looked at me and said "you know you can't wash and reuse these." FML

by killercow / 04/19/2011 at 12:19pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was tidying my room when my gran came in and offered to help. I said I didn't need any, but she started going through it anyway. She found a tube of "Very Cherry" lube and asked what it was. I subtly tore off the label and tried to convince her it was a face mask. She's taken it to try it out tonight. FML

by Dilly / 10/10/2010 at 4:29pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

by Bailey / 08/22/2010 at 2:58am / United States (Nebraska) / Kids

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate for the first time. He was sucking on my boob, everything was going good. He suddenly stopped and started choking really bad. He thought milk was coming out. Turns out, it was just his gum. The moment was ruined. FML

by me / 01/05/2010 at 11:22am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up from a nap to hear my roommate having some intimate time with his hand. The slopping and slurping sounds along with the girly man squeal as he finished haunted me all day. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2009 at 5:59pm / Iraq (Arbil) / Intimacy

Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML

by Kelavmeister / 04/16/2009 at 9:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I developed the disposable camera pictures from my family's trip to Disney World. I noticed that in the pictures I took of them in front of the big castle at Magic Kingdom, my wife and son were standing a few feet away from a man who was touching himself. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2009 at 8:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my dad if he could fix my bed. It had been squeaking for some time. He shook his head no. He then continued with, "Your bed is a security system and as far as I can tell, you haven't gotten any in weeks". FML

by Noname / 02/24/2009 at 1:13pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML

by svet / 02/21/2009 at 9:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy