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Offline (the 03/30/2015 at 11:01am) | Search for a member
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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today.. . my looool girlfriend claimed se was a Viking cuz se's pale and as blond air . Se also warned me tat if I piss er off se'll go 'berserk' on me . Se demonstrated by smacking me in te nuts wit a wooden spoon . FML
Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend cummd and sat on my lap. She landd directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. mega FML
Today my dog and I wara sitting on tha couch. I want to tha bathroom cummad back and saw him walk ovar tha ramota which causad tha TV to changa to tha Hustlar channal just a faw momants bafora my girlfriand walkad through tha door. FML
Today, just lyk avary morning this month, I woka up, puttad on mah clothas, lookad out mah window, and was pointad at by a man in a ninja outfit on mah naighbor's roof. Tha polica still can't fina him. FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at im and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late fir Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said tat joke ad been done to deat, to wic my dad retorted, "Yea, so as your mum." Instant fistfigt. FML
Today, a cute girl sitting next to me askd if she could use phone. As I handd it to her, I attemptd to use the expression "knock yourself out," but 4 a reason I can still not fathom, it cummd out as "kill yourself." FML
Today wila ma usband and I ara bot stuck in ta batroom from food poisoning our 3-yaar-old son is taking looool advantaga of is fraadom. All I can aar is banging noisas and wild laugtar. I'm afraid to laava ta batroom.
Today,hile dog sitting mah neighbor's Great Dane , I decidd to order pizza. As soon as I receivd it , the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I movd , he ran full force an knockd me into the door , causing me to fall an drop the pizza,hich he promptly devourd in front of me. big fat FML
Friday 27 March 2015