About annie_nk : Hi. I'm Annie. I'm happily married and a mother of 2 girls. I am a stay at home mom so this site helps keep me sane. I come here mainly for the comments.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Socialite
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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, I discovered the crunching noise your foot will make if you accidentally drop a cement block on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20357) - you deserved it (1701)
On 08/09/2012 at 3:33pm - health - by flatfoot - Canada (Ontario)
Today, some guy asked me if he could borrow my lighter. I said "of course," reached into my handbag, and gave him the lighter. He stared at me for a few seconds until I realised I'd given him a tampax. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17784) - you deserved it (4127)
On 08/09/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by mary - United Kingdom
Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14021) - you deserved it (2263)
On 08/09/2012 at 10:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18924) - you deserved it (1625)
On 08/08/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12236) - you deserved it (7683)
On 08/07/2012 at 3:17pm - work - by Employee (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I decided to be nice and pay a social visit to my slightly deranged grandpa. I ended up politely sitting through two hours of him lecturing me on how he "invented the modern tap", then on how sex is an Illuminati invention to "give sluts the STDs they need to kill us all". FML
I agree, your life sucks (12138) - you deserved it (1085)
On 08/03/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by yeah okay then (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15785) - you deserved it (3488)
On 07/24/2012 at 4:08pm - health - by *facefloor* (man) - United States
Today, against my advice, my boyfriend decided to read Fifty Shades of Grey in an attempt to learn how to please me in bed. Now all he does is suck on my toes, and thinks it's weird that I don't spontaneously orgasm as if I'm some kind of nymphomaniacal weirdo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25561) - you deserved it (4119)
On 07/23/2012 at 3:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my neighbor called me on vacation to tell me that she let my mother into my house to feed my fish. I don't have fish, and my mother passed away 3 years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25894) - you deserved it (1786)
On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -
Today, I searched our neighborhood for our lost dog. After screaming at the top of our lungs, driving around in circles, and asking strangers, we realized we took him to the groomers this morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4207) - you deserved it (24982)
On 07/19/2012 at 7:56pm - animals - by anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was at work when a cute guy came up to me and said he liked my shirt. In a desperate attempt to say something back, I said, "Thanks, I like your shoelaces." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16019) - you deserved it (4307)
On 07/19/2012 at 6:31pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8862) - you deserved it (31271)
Today, my boyfriend thought it appropriate to let me know that doing the "duck face" in my Facebook pictures "highlights my mustache." FML
I agree, your life sucks (4998) - you deserved it (45458)
On 07/17/2012 at 7:30pm - love - by mustachio101 (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend. He won't go on a cruise with me in the gulf of Mexico, because he thinks we will crash into an iceberg like in Titanic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17863) - you deserved it (2350)
On 07/17/2012 at 5:11pm - love - by Alliente - United States
Today, my father, who is going through a serious mid-life crisis, walked into my room, told me to "sit the fuck down," and spent the next two hours ranting about how the Lord of the Rings books prophesy the end of the world this December, and that Sauron is an analogy for "corrupt bankers." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15417) - you deserved it (1195)
On 07/17/2012 at 4:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Monday 17 June 2013
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