About angrynegro7 : I am unimpressed...GO AWAY!
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angrynegro7's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 11/13/2012 at 6:34am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
Today, I found my childhood diary stashed in a box in the attic. I flipped to the last page and noticed a little note written by my now deceased father. It read, "Well son, this diary proves that you're a whiny asshole - Dad." Thanks Dad, from beyond the grave. FML
by Anonymous / 11/12/2012 at 9:47pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML
by awhmaaan / 02/27/2012 at 10:55am / United Kingdom / Health
by JukeboxValkyrie / 02/16/2012 at 2:52am / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, I got my hands on some meet and greet passes for a concert. My fiancé and I got our picture taken with the band. A few moments later, in my excitement, instead of texting the picture to my friend, I accidentally deleted it. FML
by vixiecat / 02/15/2012 at 2:33pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
by SpLo0gIeR / 02/13/2012 at 10:30am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML
by loveinanelevator / 02/13/2012 at 7:03am / Health
Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML
by amythest / 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Kids
Today, I was called an 'unhelpful little bitch' by a customer, after I informed her that we couldn't order a pair of shoes she wanted from the company in her size because it's a discontinued model. This little tirade continued for another few minutes, with her insulting me and my intelligence. FML
by Unhelpful / 02/06/2012 at 11:27pm / United States (Texas) / Work
by sorrygrandma / 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, my nine year old stepson overheard me telling my husband that I was almost out of my favorite shampoo, and since it was discontinued, I couldn't buy any more. He got in the shower and happily emptied the bottles down the drain. FML
by Anonymous / 01/31/2012 at 12:31pm / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/25/2012 at 11:18pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on my knees and be your dog." FML
by Anonymous / 01/23/2012 at 12:12am / United States / Work
by MyHeadHurts / 01/20/2012 at 5:42am / Ireland / Intimacy
by too slow / 01/18/2012 at 12:09am / United States / Love
- Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.…