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amyrules99

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amyrules99
  • Town/Country : New York, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 542
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About amyrules99 : Umm hi! I'm Amy and imma boss :P

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amyrules99's favorite FMLs

Today, the job search agency that I use asked me to stop sending in my resume, as no one had hired me in three years, and that the situation was unlikely to change. FML

#17862767
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19408) - you deserved it (2818)

On 09/29/2011 at 10:32am - work - by crushed (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had to explain to a woman I didn't know that my husband was killed overseas. She replied, "I know exactly how you feel, my dog died last month." FML

#17793526
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34918) - you deserved it (2063)

On 09/21/2011 at 3:01am - animals - by socks - United States

Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML

#17789217
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26372) - you deserved it (2116)

On 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized just how much my bad sex life has started affecting me, when after not being able to climax from masturbating, I instinctively faked an orgasm. FML

#17786592
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24897) - you deserved it (7245)

On 09/20/2011 at 6:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my girlfriend gave me a speech on me "not being manly enough". I started crying. FML

#17762644
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13554) - you deserved it (35214)

On 09/17/2011 at 4:17am - love - by Anonymous - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, my mom admitted that she always makes me put away the dishes because my obsessive compulsive tendencies force me to arrange the glasses and silverware by size, just the way she likes them. FML

#17747814
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16871) - you deserved it (3250)

On 09/14/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by Awesome. (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34214) - you deserved it (4750)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

#17709124
551 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13756) - you deserved it (162591)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my grandmother pulled down her pants and screamed, "Kiss my ass" in the middle of a packed restaurant. FML

#17669006
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24882) - you deserved it (2404)

On 09/05/2011 at 9:00am - misc - by Brie - United States (Georgia)

Today, my daughter turned Emo. FML

#17640475
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40572) - you deserved it (13023)

On 09/01/2011 at 11:44pm - kids - by nyaahaha - United States

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

#17488999
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11709) - you deserved it (36430)

On 08/16/2011 at 9:20am - love - by worried (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

#17488999
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11709) - you deserved it (36430)

On 08/16/2011 at 9:20am - love - by worried (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was having a great time shopping with my gran, until she started complaining about all the foreigners ruining our town, and counting each person who didn't look 100% British. It wouldn't even have been so bad if I wasn't adopted into the family, from Russia. FML

#17330812
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27642) - you deserved it (2260)

On 08/01/2011 at 11:05am - misc - by Foreigner (woman) - Jersey

Today, my three-year-old daughter rushed in, excited about her new baby brother or sister. She was so excited, I didn't have the heart to tell her men can't have babies, and I just have a beer gut. FML

#17207646
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22138) - you deserved it (10522)

On 07/21/2011 at 7:46pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
355 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41220) - you deserved it (6104)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States



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