Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amyrules99

Search for a member

amyrules99

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1727
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About amyrules99 : Umm hi! I'm Amy and imma boss :P

amyrules99's page activity

Visits<b>abbythemuffin</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 5:32pm<b>Jaager</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 11:34pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 3:32pm<b>casarez35</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 1:21pm<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 9:30am<b>vicki101</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 6:48pm<b>lovetotelljokes</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 2:50am<b>TheSuperNerd</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 3:27pm<b>regenerate</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 5:55pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 7:45pm<b>Austin300</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 7:16pm<b>AwkwardStalker</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 12:37pm<b>thisguy184</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 2:00pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 2:55pm<b>downzi104</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 5:24pm<b>rob02</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 10:28am<b>Kit_is_the_Shit</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 12:34pm<b>lexxiii</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 6:04pm

Liked!<b>Jaager</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 5:34am

amyrules99's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of amyrules99's badges

amyrules99's favorite FMLs

Today, I went out on a first date. He insisted we go to McDonald's and split a Happy Meal because he "didn't want to waste any money on a first date." FML

#19098700
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31178) - you deserved it (4081)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:44am - love - by Cheap N Happy (woman) - United States

Today, I met my brother for the first time in 20 years. Everything was going great, until he tried to make out with me. FML

#19094213
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43284) - you deserved it (2831)

On 02/16/2012 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was holding my 3 year old brother, and apparently he thinks it's hilarious to pull my tank top down and scream ''BOOBS!'' in public. FML

#19093688
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30251) - you deserved it (4424)

On 02/16/2012 at 2:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML

#19088946
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15773) - you deserved it (29127)

On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

#19085397
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26393) - you deserved it (1956)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by jess (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, it appears that it's Single Loser Awareness Day. FML

#19073057
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23218) - you deserved it (5987)

On 02/14/2012 at 10:32am - love - by crazytown62 - United States

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

#19072659
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34565) - you deserved it (2626)

On 02/14/2012 at 9:29am - love - by Illinoisgirl - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML

#19062994
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23998) - you deserved it (4522)

On 02/13/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by cieee - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML

#19059708
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27855) - you deserved it (2107)

On 02/12/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML

#19059341
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36844) - you deserved it (2698)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm - kids - by amythest - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML

#19058382
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8270) - you deserved it (25032)

On 02/12/2012 at 4:50pm - misc - by fuck teh poleese (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my brother's girlfriend broke up with him. He has been playing Whitney Houston's "I will always love you" all day. FML

#19045802
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29081) - you deserved it (2897)

On 02/11/2012 at 1:23am - love - by annon - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8751) - you deserved it (66094)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8751) - you deserved it (66094)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: