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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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amelia_moon

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amelia_moon
  • Town/Country : Helsinki, Finland
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 18 October 1988 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 389
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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amelia_moon's favorite FMLs

Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML

#6761205 (156)

I agree, your life sucks (12363) - you deserved it (19236)

On 12/15/2009 at 3:32am - love - by Proof-Reader (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

#6298765 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (12810) - you deserved it (21367)

On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "Orgasm face." And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML

#5344643 (255)

I agree, your life sucks (56725) - you deserved it (2967)

On 09/19/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I asked my aunt to pluck my eyebrows since hers are perfectly done. What I didn't know is she gets hers professionally shaped and she doesn't know how to shape eyebrows. I now look like a surprised Vulcan. FML

#4606857 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (28631) - you deserved it (14849)

On 08/17/2009 at 6:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

#4053619 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (16749) - you deserved it (39915)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML

#2147353 (358)

I agree, your life sucks (68943) - you deserved it (32612)

On 05/21/2009 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by a (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

#481631 (523)

I agree, your life sucks (249153) - you deserved it (34312)

On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up!". FML

#56665 (529)

I agree, your life sucks (141736) - you deserved it (53043)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)