Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ambamm135

Search for a member

ambamm135
  • Town/Country : That one city, in that one country
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 11 September 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 1482
  • Number of comments : 218
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ambamm135's last visitors

hardflip95thisguy184Feklfekl2222SomefruitsBudderchookmander2124xDochxMrsKent123sassyland

ambamm135's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of ambamm135's badges

ambamm135's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a really big test in a class that I was failing. It was worth at least 7 grades so I studied my butt off. During the test, a girl with huge breasts sat down next to me and I couldn't stop staring. My test got confiscated because they thought I was cheating. FML

#19414845
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8833) - you deserved it (47939)

On 04/05/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by tatatest (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned that my roommate doesn't actually know a damn thing about cooking. I'm suffering the effects of him telling me that chicken is best eaten medium-rare. FML

#19404145
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16501) - you deserved it (10108)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:02pm - health - by Ralph - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found a used condom in my trash can. I have been happily married to my wife for 7 years, and we use other forms of birth control. FML

#19380056
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32893) - you deserved it (2098)

On 03/31/2012 at 12:49am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was stabbed in the chest. Not with a knife though, the under-wire from my bra escaped and stabbed me in the boob. FML

#19321337
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21040) - you deserved it (2697)

On 03/21/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by J.O.S (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

 Today, I decided to finally try out the veggie slicer I bought a few months ago to make healthy homemade potato chips. Along with the sliced potatoes, I am now missing about a quarter inch chunk of skin from the side of my hand and quite a bit of blood. At least the chips were good. FML

#19281452
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14845) - you deserved it (11069)

On 03/15/2012 at 3:53am - health - by missgayle319 - United States (Texas)

Today, I dropped a knife while cooking. Luckily it missed my foot, but only because it hit my knee. FML

#19254143
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18530) - you deserved it (3551)

On 03/10/2012 at 10:06pm - health - by jmac (man) - United States (California)

Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML

#19253868
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8316) - you deserved it (133550)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm - misc - by Major3 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I spat up blood and had horrible chest pain. My mom still made me go to school, claiming she needed to take the cat to the vet instead of me to the doctor. FML

#19234186
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26862) - you deserved it (1793)

On 03/07/2012 at 5:07pm - health - by Hungrytoothbrush (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

#19222956
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23692) - you deserved it (7493)

On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States

Today, while waiting tables, I watched a woman pull the bacon off her roast beef melt and eat it. She then called me over and spent several minutes complaining about the our chefs' inadequacy because they didn't put bacon on her sandwich. FML

#19198099
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22922) - you deserved it (1383)

On 03/01/2012 at 7:47pm - work - by craigtm029429 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the boy I tutor failed his math test. As a result, the family fired me. The boy failed because he forgot to write his name at the top. FML

#19190848
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31136) - you deserved it (1706)

On 02/29/2012 at 7:01pm - kids - by Fairy31 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom". That's how he put it, anyway. FML

#19183355
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26170) - you deserved it (1991)

On 02/28/2012 at 5:04pm - love - by salt. - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was eating a meatball sub when a meatball fell out and rolled into my hair and all down my shirt. I couldn't find the missing meatball anywhere. I found it later, in my handbag. FML

#19179734
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19515) - you deserved it (3638)

On 02/28/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by malloreigh (woman) - Australia

Today, my oven decided that it was going to lock and clean itself right in the middle of cooking my steaks. FML

#19157879
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23117) - you deserved it (3398)

On 02/25/2012 at 12:21am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to tell my wife that the new "vegan" diet she has put us on is not working with my body. It's not the horrible gas, hot shits, or constant hunger that made me realize this. It was the dream I had about fried chicken that did. FML

#19134075
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21149) - you deserved it (2655)

On 02/21/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by kohler9790 - United States



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: