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amathema's FML badges
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amathema's favorite FMLs
Today, I was texting my girlfriend about cross dressing and I said, "It would be hard for me to conceal my weapon." She instantly replied, "Not really, it's like finding a needle in a haystack, you'll be alright." FML
by DanteWest1000 / 04/03/2012 at 12:43am / United States (Nebraska) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/22/2012 at 11:47am / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm / India / Intimacy
Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML
by Anonymous / 02/01/2012 at 1:13am / Canada / Animals
Today, I drove into a cluster of dustbins thanks to my dozy cat who'd managed to get into my car, fall asleep, and wake up while I was driving to work. I lost control when I was startled by him staring at me in the rear-view mirror. FML
by Anonymous / 01/18/2012 at 6:30am / Australia / Transportation
by joeshmoe / 01/15/2012 at 7:52am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
- Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns,… Today, it was my boyfriend and my six-month anniversary. I've really fallen in love with him, and I… Today, I found out the guy I've been dating for 5 months is engaged to his girlfriend of 3 years. I…