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  • Number of visits : 1808
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

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alyspar2's page activity

Visits<b>MisterKnowItAll</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 7:36am<b>UnknownTracker</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 1:55pm<b>lilferrit</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 3:45am<b>JazzHandsFML</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 7:08pm<b>DaniloDanigga</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 8:56pm<b>zingline89</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 12:19am<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 11:13am<b>laurenasabutton</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 12:43pm<b>TheKidOnFire</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:44pm<b>Dory123</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 2:31pm<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 9:34am<b>Mornai</b> - the 03/07/2012 at 6:25pm

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alyspar2's favorite FMLs

Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2012 at 9:20am / United States (New Mexico) / Love

Today, I had to use the restroom while at work. I had the choice of the stall with a broken lock, or the stall with a huge crack in the partition wall. Not two minutes after I sat down, I noticed someone peeking in. FML

by Me / 03/07/2012 at 1:24pm / United States / Work

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

by scaredshitless / 03/03/2012 at 8:55am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML

by JeffeeBojangles / 02/28/2012 at 7:46am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I was in a grocery store with my great-grandmother. It would've been nice to know she hadn't taken her medication before she started beating the cashier with her umbrella. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2012 at 3:01am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

by jess / 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2012 at 12:04am / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

by coleslaw / 02/03/2012 at 12:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

by Rachal / 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, a man crashed into my car. He then got out of his car, dug a toothbrush and toothpaste out of his bag, and tried to brush away the damage. FML

by toothpaste / 01/19/2012 at 7:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, I had to sit through 10 minutes of hearing a man on the tram tell his friend in explicit detail about all the filthy sex acts he'd like to do to me. His friend told him to take a photo to jack off to later. When I tried to tell the tram driver, he told me to "take it as a compliment." FML

by missprude666 / 01/19/2012 at 3:32am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, my grandmother introduced me to her friends as her 16-year-old granddaughter "who has never been kissed." FML

by cheese123 / 01/03/2012 at 12:25am / United States / Miscellaneous