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alliyah_monaee

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alliyah_monaee

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  • Number of visits : 2247
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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alliyah_monaee's page activity

Visits<b>zeropointnine</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:59am

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alliyah_monaee's favorite FMLs

Today, I arrived at the salon to get my hair done for prom. The lady at the front desk insisted I didn't have an appointment. After looking back on my recent calls, it turned out I called the wrong number and whatever asshole was on the other line played along. FML

#21424643
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28082) - you deserved it (3787)

On 06/11/2015 at 7:14pm - misc - by Badhairday - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the man who stole my laptop at the train station yesterday used the contact information I had written on it to call me and ask for the password. FML

#21424633
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26916) - you deserved it (1766)

On 06/11/2015 at 6:46pm - misc - by what - United States (California)

Today, I found out I wasn't invited to my neighbor's funeral, with whom I had been good friends with for a long time. When I asked her husband why, he said, "We have a small amount of money and can't afford for you to eat all of the refreshments." FML

#21424589
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23319) - you deserved it (2868)

On 06/11/2015 at 5:04pm - health - by DUFF - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my housemate got back at me for asking for her share of a bill by losing her virginity to the guy I like, very loudly. FML

#21423445
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26340) - you deserved it (2013)

On 06/09/2015 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Ireland

Today, while working at Home Depot, a customer tried to engage me in a conversation about which gardening tool would "hypothetically" be the best to kill his wife with. FML

#21132614
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44358) - you deserved it (3600)

On 05/06/2014 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I realised that when I asked my girlfriend 4 months ago if was she on the pill, she thought I meant hay fever tablets. I'm going to be a father. FML

#21123315
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59714) - you deserved it (28470)

On 04/26/2014 at 8:28am - intimacy - by Sniffles (man) - Ireland

Today, I was sitting in the coffee shop where my boyfriend and I used to go before he broke up with me about a week ago. I was missing him and wishing he was there, when all of a sudden this 14-year-old kid comes up to me and says, "He's not coming, you may as well go home." FML

#21097979
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44181) - you deserved it (6350)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

#21093670
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39541) - you deserved it (10396)

On 03/22/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by campus pussy (man) - United States (California)

Today, at a family gathering, it emerged that my now ex-fiancé has been sleeping with his brother's girlfriend for some time now. A fight broke out, the police were called, and more than one of his relatives are blaming me for him cheating with her. FML

#21093499
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39279) - you deserved it (3216)

On 03/22/2014 at 1:31pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was babysitting my nephew and we decided to color together. He drew a picture of someone who looked dead, almost zombie-like, while everyone else looked pretty normal. When I asked who it was, he said in a serious, scary voice, "It's you." FML

#21088838
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36699) - you deserved it (3794)

On 03/17/2014 at 5:51am - kids - by BondingTime - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a lady who works for my husband confided in me that they've been sleeping with each other and now she's pregnant. She didn't know I was his wife. FML

Today, I followed my wife out, since she's been acting strangely lately and I was suspicious. She met up with a guy at a restaurant, who she later claimed was her brother. Either she's cheating on me, or it's tradition in her family to make out and grope each other at the end of meals. FML

#21087493
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59402) - you deserved it (4556)

On 03/15/2014 at 5:48pm - love - by broken vows (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML

#21085148
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42333) - you deserved it (3451)

On 03/12/2014 at 8:11pm - work - by Anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on a bus. When I awoke suddenly, half of the bus was staring at me, with some people chuckling and smiling. I have no idea what I did. FML

#21084790
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44126) - you deserved it (5067)

On 03/12/2014 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked why I never let him go down on me. I told him that it doesn't do much for me, even though it really does. I didn't have the courage to tell him that it's because he acts like a rabid dog when he does. FML



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