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alipod

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  • Number of visits : 1143
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>happyllama12</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 8:40am<b>lillypatter</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 7:44pm<b>ast3150</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 5:06pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:04pm<b>Cenobyte</b> - the 05/31/2011 at 5:49am<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 02/23/2011 at 1:10pm

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alipod's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching a movie with my parents when a sex scene came on. As if that wasn't awkward enough, they started making out on the couch behind me. FML

#20577290
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57083) - you deserved it (5179)

On 04/06/2013 at 10:15am - intimacy - by ohgodwhy - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the company I was fired from three years ago merged with the company I work at now. The new owners' first order of business was to fire me again. FML

#20508810
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42651) - you deserved it (2796) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/15/2013 at 8:37pm - work - by Nico - Sent from mobile version

Today, after declining an amazing job offer that pays more than double what I make now in order to accept a promotion my boss offered me if I stayed, I asked when I would receive the promotion and pay raise. She snorted and said, "You thought I was serious about that?" FML

#19703375
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28066) - you deserved it (9024)

On 05/30/2012 at 5:37am - work - by Fackwork (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, while taking part in a lifeguarding exercise, I was supposed to "drown" to get another guard to save me. After all was done, my boss called me into his office and screamed at me for "drowning the wrong way," and threatening our reputation. FML

#19699245
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22053) - you deserved it (1757)

On 05/29/2012 at 2:43pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML

#19035452
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27399) - you deserved it (8694) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2012 at 5:11pm - misc - by Bonapp - France

Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML

#17773363
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8003) - you deserved it (45245)

On 09/18/2011 at 4:17pm - animals - by shithead (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I started my first day as a waitress. After getting my ass slapped, drinks and food spilled over me, and being tripped by a bratty kid, my tips were stolen. FML

#17764475
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33157) - you deserved it (2230)

On 09/17/2011 at 1:13pm - work - by RebekahBrooke - United States

Today, I found out my wife and three daughters all have their period on seperate weeks. I now have no break from yelling. FML

#17761753
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39307) - you deserved it (4691)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:39am - misc - by thedeerman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML

#17391065
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35084) - you deserved it (10008)

On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, someone came over and told my mother, "I'm your son's friend Morris, I need to get something out of his car", so she gave him the keys. I have no friend called Morris, and now I don't have a sound system either. FML

#17266001
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36804) - you deserved it (2986)

On 07/26/2011 at 9:35am - misc - by ceetee - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML

#17253981
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36806) - you deserved it (5218)

On 07/25/2011 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was walking to the store when I ran into one of my friends. He said he heard about my bike being stolen the day before, and that whoever took it was a heartless dick. I hadn't told anyone about the theft. FML

#17231826
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41670) - you deserved it (2832)

On 07/23/2011 at 5:27pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I accidentally asked a one-armed man which arm he wanted me to take blood from. He asked for a different nurse. FML

#17207535
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13854) - you deserved it (43261)

On 07/21/2011 at 7:35pm - work - by ohmygosh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
426 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31006) - you deserved it (89785)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

#17080358
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38258) - you deserved it (21784)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm - misc - by couldntholdit (woman) - United States (California)



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