aliaskis

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aliaskis

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2789
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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aliaskis's page activity

Visits<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 5:57am<b>Miss_Whipped</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 9:19am<b>weedle99</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 5:12pm<b>vadskimer</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 11:02pm<b>hiddenaccount</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 10:14am<b>theFickleFinger</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 3:46pm<b>Crazion</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 3:34pm<b>yenze</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 1:20pm<b>Avenger225</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 12:23am<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 11:09pm<b>iMuffinKat</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 12:29am<b>dno79</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 5:01am<b>WCARlover</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 11:04pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 2:14pm<b>FMLollipop</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 2:41am<b>Kjaerlighet</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 4:16pm<b>FreshDonuts</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 8:30am<b>TaskforceTaco</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 3:33pm

Fucked!<b>dno79</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:01am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 3:41pm<b>cmorrissey587</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 6:36am<b>thunderfucked</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 4:11am<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 10:58pm<b>that70sshow1223</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 3:11am<b>daffidwilde</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 2:39pm

aliaskis's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

aliaskis's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog was licking the dishes in the dishwasher when his collar got stuck on it. Then he got scared of the dishwasher rack following him and ran away really fast. Now I have no dishes. FML

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my social anxiety got so bad, I nearly had a panic attack when too many people joined my World of Warcraft party. FML

by SocialAnxietyNightmare / 02/09/2012 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, my boyfriend informed me that my vagina reminds him of ham. But that's okay, because ham is his favorite food. FML

by thankzbabe / 01/04/2012 at 7:32am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I stayed up until 4 am. I was waiting for both my cats to fall asleep, so I could play Santa and stuff their stockings in secret. FML

by Anonymoose / 12/25/2011 at 6:39am / Switzerland (Zurich) / Animals

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

by Bob smith / 12/19/2011 at 3:57pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 9:16pm / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Miscellaneous

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

by unknown52 / 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Health

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2011 at 5:35am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I ever cheated on him, he'll chop my body up and dispose of all the parts, but keep my boobies, because he likes them. FML

by Faithful / 11/24/2011 at 5:01am / Singapore / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

by Margo / 11/15/2011 at 10:16am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, my daughter in law sent me another romantic text that was meant for her husband. Not only can't she spell for shit, the clichés she uses are horrifyingly embarrassing. The fact this keeps happening makes me want to slam her head in the oven. FML

by Username / 11/12/2011 at 4:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was following my friend to her house in my car, because I didn't know where it was. I'd been following her for at least an hour when she pulled into a gas station. Turns out I'd been following the wrong car. I have no idea where I am. FML

by friedchicken / 11/12/2011 at 1:43am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation